Journey with Him

2012-02-02T18:35:00.000-08:00

This post is exclusively selfishly hedonistically about what i want! Wahahahaaa! :D

Things i want to do:

1) I seriously want to spend a day playing board games. I missed playing RISK! I like playing boardgames with friends. One ideal day will be sitting at a cafe, ordering a drink, with good friends, good food and just playing board games! :DDD

2) I would love to have a pinic and fly a kite with friends. One of my kite flying experience is with Jon and he had headache that day... :( I hope to fly a nice kite again

3) Start painting again. I used to love painting and just paint for leisure..paint for friends. Its really fun. :) Its tapping on another side of me.

4) Workout: Pilates, gym, run...i am seriously lazy. I am such a lazy person. I wanted to start but kept procrastinating.

5) Go shopping and really buy some clothes. It has been since 7 months that i bought a few pieces of new clothes for myself. I didn't even buy any new clothes for CNY."( sad isn't it.

6) I did that during my 1 week break. Sit at the cafe..enjoy hot chocolate over a nice book. That is really great. I would like to do that again! Most important: a great book!

Please Dawn! Make my "wantings" come true.

2011-11-17T21:23:00.000-08:00

Updates: "Littleness"

I haven't been doing much reflection as i have quite many things to attend to. But i guess this is a time of doing the little things faithfully, and the "littleness" is in almost every aspect of my life. I mean, I am not really doing the "casting vision", "leading ministry/department" that i used to do. Initially, as quite a vocal person and also filled with ideas, I am not very used to it....but now, i am quite used to it already. I am not sure if I have lost that aspect of me....but, i just don't really feel it anymore. Maybe, God is developing another side of me.

Work:

The "littleness" at work; I am doing case work and children/youth programs. At here, its really nice to be able to work with different families with different problems. I could go to 3 to 4 homes in one day...like this week, for 3 days, i had 3 to 4 homes to visit. I am always touched by the resilience some of my clients have, and at times, saddened by their situation. Sometimes, I am touched by my colleagues' passion and help rendered to these families and admired their skills and heart. Its great. I felt "little" in the midst of these "giant-social workers" and the "littleness" is great because I am constantly amazed/touched by their work. I am also doing administrative work in my youth/children program. Last time, I am super poor in admin. Not that I ver good at it now...but, I have gotten use to it. The "littleness" in the admin work before, made me rather unhappy and insignificant. Now, I am just glad to do it because its nice to see things neatly done and also helps to support my colleagues. What a change in attitude! Thank God that He helped me see things in perspective.

I started a prayer group at my work place so that we can direct our work to Lord Jesus. Its a small initiative and I like that. Its just being faithful in initiating and maintaining it. Frankly, though there are many Christians in my workplace, alot of them don't have the time to pray together or maybe not comfortable/ not interested....whatever the reason maybe, I know that I have taken a small step to bring God into our workplace! :)

Church

My church is small..and there is some sort of "littleness" in that. I am leading the children ministry and this year's Christmas musical. Though there are some kind of leadership in this, I just feel that the faithfulness and "littleness" is needed. There is no airy, fairy vision casting nor big groups of people to lead...but its just consistency, supporting and leading.

Family

At home, its no longer about me but also about Jon..its about little things in daily living like cooking, household chores, supporting Jon in his studies, taking care of health, simple times together, finance...its really the little things that counts, that maintains the relationship and household matters. Its the simple, little things. Also, the consistency in going to inlaws/mother's/dad's place....and doing those little things to spend time/appreciate.

Summary

I feel the "littleness" growing me...the support role...and, sometimes, its feels insignificant and ordinary..but its not a bad thing. Its God that is the "greatness", and we are nothing as we are here now and maybe gone tommorow. I give thanks for the "littleness" in this time and would like to grow from it..attributes of support, humility and faithfulness.

2011-08-10T20:50:00.000-07:00

As this is my personal blog, i try not to blog about Jon & myself..but, we are so inter-twined now! Gosh. Anyway, marriage life so far has been good, not much of a big adjustment between Jon & myself when we were still dating. Strangely, our habits are not widely apart nor are we particular about toothpaste, toilet seats & every other little details. I guess we are just more interested in other stuff like spending time, our parents, church, friends & how we are to each other etc. :) Thats a good surprise for me. I thought there will be many stupid quarrels over small things & adjustments will take some time! We only took our 1st month to adjust to everything!

However, I had lesser time to spend with my parents and friends. Actually, as I stayed away from my parents for a long time, it helped in my adjustments very much. But i do miss spending time with my friends! Please don't blame me dear friends! :(( will try to catch up soon! :)

2011-06-16T02:38:00.000-07:00

Updates

I haven't been uploading anything for a long time...and for this post, I have no pictures to update.
Well, these 3 months have been quite funny as I haven't experience so many different injuries and weird insect bites at one time:

1) First, i had fungi toe due to March showers and having to wear covered shoe for homevisits. Its nothing disgusting..but its painful! And I suffered for 3 months! :(

2) Then I knocked my toe on a rock! (Another toe) Its stupid. Its was late and I wasn't sure looking where I was heading. The toe turned purplish black. Arg..how awful.

3) I had mystery itcy insect bites all over my body. I suspected bed bugs! My dad felt so accused by me asking him if there are any bed bugs in my room...he proudly declared that there aren't such thing since he cleared my room constantly. He quickly went back home to sun all my stuff and remove my bed frame..i also went back to de-tox my things. Yes, no bed bugs. Then, my office's sofa is found with many bed bugs! (but i don't usually sit there!) Urgh.. client's house also got bed bugs..its a very buggy week. Bugs bites didn't leave any scars but went off within a few days. Thank God.

Ok, I have been looking forward and counting down to being Mrs Jon Wee. Its 9 days left down. Well, strangely, i am not as excited as I thought I would. I grew quite tired shopping for the many things needed too and also the details of coordinating the event. But, its nice lar. First time spent so much money...and friends & love ones have been very generous with their time and everything. Thats very nice and indeed feel very loved and blessed. Thank you! For me, most importantly, I get married to Jon Wee and spent our life together in the Lord. Nothing really matter so much..be it the wedding prog or event itself. I thank God that He has provided and made everything possible for me and Jonnie Wee.

Will upload pics soon!

2011-02-17T03:07:00.000-08:00

*The Next Stop* This is my youth supervisor in deep thoughts always.

Those corporate pic taking sessions. After so many pics, I am simply exhausted. :P

Our management retreat playing games. Don't worry, we are not crazy. :D

Our NL Flower 4

Having to leave to the next stop, I would like to take some time to do some reflection. :) Well, these past 3 years have been one of those seasons where I faced alot of challenging situations both personal life and work transitions. Its amazing recalling how I actually knew God more and how I grew spiritually through all. I could remember how I got all excited having to manage a drop in, and thinking of many ideas on how I could engage and attract more youths. I set up a youth committee and also had some regular events going. Consistency and follow-up was so important, but its one of my weakness because I am a starter/innovator. I have a great supervisor whom I looked up and modelled after his good points. I learnt alot spiritually. Because that season was also tough for me, I actually learnt how to fast, pray, intercede and discern God's voice.

Going to children's dept was a challenge for me. That time, I came out from a rough season...and still struggling with residential issues. It wasn't easy then. Everything was unfamilar and I worked with another supervisor. However, i learnt alot on leadership, making key decisions and exercising wisdom in all matters. I also learn how to mentor others too.

I think Children's work is alot more different than Youth work. Everyone has different methods, philosophies on managing, nurturing and discipling them. Sometimes, you got to work with the differences. I learnt alot about managing children in my line of work though i didn't manage them directly all the time. I also get first hand experience on dealing with misbehavior (which I had some experience back then) and also training others to do so. I did alot alot of assembly talks, volunteer trainings and adult/parent facilitation in my line of work. I also grew in programme management, leadership & management planning. Now, I am a pretty good planner ;) It has been a great experience. Most of all, my most satisfying was the F4 (Flower 4). Seeing growth & them learning has been so great.

I am going to miss those children & youth :) (thats quite an usual thing ya)

Looking forward, changes are always uncertain (which I am alright with) and am not sure what I exactly I am embarking into. But, certainly, i remain focus to grow in compassion like my Lord Jesus and to serve the community.

Till then,

2011-02-13T18:49:00.000-08:00

+Desires+Dreams+Thoughts+

Thoughts:

Recently, I have having quite some thoughts about the gospels and sharing them. Last time, when i was in Beloved group, I shared the gospel, did Bible studies quite regularly. Ever since I left the Beloved group, I stopped doing Bible studies and sharing the gospel for awhile. I am still studying at SBC and recently, am doing NT survey. I managed to finish the 4 gospels in two weeks..(its part of my reading and assignment) Aside of fulfilling a task, i have been doing some thinking about sharing the gospel in a relevant way. Also, I am amazed once again by how real Jesus is. Seriously, if you studied the reality of Jesus, you will find no reason to doubt Him because everything written in the Bible is factual, historical accurate and Jesus Himself fulfills many prophecies. Then I thought about how sinful and inperfect I am...and how I could I ever deserve Jesus..and...thought about how many i know rejected Jesus..
When i read ACTS (One of the book in the Bible) I saw how Peter, Paul and many believers of Jesus preaching the gospel in a relevant way...I just thought about how we can be so irrelevant in sharing the Word to others. Well, everything is just really powerful..the work of the Holy Spirit convicting many to believe in Jesus and the growth of Church history.
I decided to be serious and grateful for my faith in Jesus...knowing that He is real and I needed Salvation. :) Man, its not going to be easy..keeping that diligence..growing in His Word and service to Him. Thank God that the Holy Spirit dwells in me.

Dreams:

I used to like dreaming alot. Dreaming of the impossible..and I could write stories of my imaginations. As I grew older, I dreamt lesser..and become more realistic n down to earth. I wrote a few stories..hopefully, i could publish my imagination ;)

I always dream...

1)What if I become a missionary (Overseas)? How would I be? I am not adventurous and I am not that independent. Can I? Yet, I thought about reaching out to the orphans.

2)What if I did not go into social work? Where would I be? What would I do? Maybe work with video production? I think life will be so different..i will be totally different.

3)What if I didn't make certain decisions or mistakes that I made? Will life be different? Will things be different?

Well, no matter what..I am comforted that God is with me in all seasons..and He has been very faithful in all seasons..guiding me and leading me. I am sure that God never left me and I could always be confident of His goodness no matter what.

Desires:

I am pretty contented with all the over flowing blessings I have. I don't deserve it, but God blesses. In fact, I sometimes fear that I will wake up knowing that all that happened became a dream. Well, I know thats quite bo-liao. I must learn that being contented is not just about having..but also, even if I don't have it, I should be thankful for what I have.

1) I desire to delight in God..(thats not a easy task)

2) I desire being a good wife to Jon wee

3) I desire to share the gospel and do Bible studies

4) I desire to have a home n family with Jon wee (lttle Jonnies ;)

5) I desire to see Jon loving God and He being successful

6) I desire to change..to improve..to work on my weaknesses

7) I desire a holiday with Jon Wee

8) I desire for my parents and sister to know Jesus

9) I desire to be a good daughter in law to Jon's parents & grandma

Till then,
Dawn

2010

2010-12-12T21:25:00.000-08:00

A year of thanksgiving & fruitfulness!

Though the year hasn't ended, i would like to blog some of my thoughts suming up in this blog. Well, it has been a year of answered prayers, good relationships built, work done & God working in me.

My walk with the Almighty

I really enjoy growing with my sisters @ work, with Jon etc. I enjoyed when the Lord spoke to me through my time with Him, encourages me with verses & through His people ;) I like praying alot ;) & am learning how to listen to Him. I wouldn't say i have a life changing & spectacular encounter with the Lord this year..but it has been great seeing little breakthroughs & learning to be more like Him in my daily life. ;) This year is a year where I battled more of what is within me & seeing small breakthroughs here & there. Also, Jon & myself settled more or less in a church now & have been serving actively too ;)

Relationship with Jon

It was a year of adjustment for both of us as Jon went into full time ministry & part time studies. Well God has been taking good care of us in many ways. ;) We constantly committed the relationship to God & learnt how to love, commit, submit, respect to each other. Its like a daily exercise. There were ups & downs but prayer + committment + God's grace to each other brought us through. We went through PMC (Premarital Counseling) & also am engaged to each other ;) We are ready to be committed to each other & walk through this life together now.

Work

Whatever i set to do in the beginning of the year came pass & thank God for that. I also had two new colleagues in my department which i enjoyed very much. Though there are dry moments..but everything happens for the good of those God loves. I learnt much from slightly difficult situations @ work. So far, all has been alright. ;)

Family

I learnt how to respect & honor my parents more this year. I have never pray to be a good daughter nor ask God to give me wisdom. This year, more intentionally, i did & i am learning how to. Also, I been praying for my parent's salvations. Nothing happened yet, but I believe when we pray, things are churning ;) Stay tune!

They love me too! Soon, i will have another set of parents. Uncle Willie has been sending me home almost everytime I go to Jon's place. They always make sure i reach home safe & on time ;) Auntie Lily has been blessing me with her generousity (both in her heart & outwardly) I
also like Jon's grannies too. Though i don't talk much to them but they have been very nice to me.

We are engaged on 31st Oct ;)

Our relationship has been so fun, so filled with life's ups & downs. Most importantly, we stick by

each other. Its' good!

Studying & doing assignments with Jon has been a part of my lifestyle :) My brain cells are very fried this year.

Dayna :) so adorable. She is my aunt's daughter. She is cute lar. I just want to put her pic.

Jose. Also cute :) My another aunt's son.

SR Children. I taught a group this year. A very good class. They are so sweet ;)

My dear Children service colleagues. We are in the office celebrating children's day ;)

2010-11-11T21:28:00.000-08:00

The Patience Lesson

What is Patience?

"Accepting a difficult situation without giving a deadline to remove it." (CF)

Tips of wisdom: Patience is key!

1) Appeal to the right person
2) Pick the right time
3) Have the right attitudes
4) Choose the right words
5) Decide to be grateful regardless of the decision

2010-10-13T23:16:00.000-07:00

I been tasked with this priviledge to teach a group of wonderful, adorable and willing to learn children in the Steady Readers programme. Its a programme New Life has and it has been a very good programme for the children. We had a final graduation project: Bookmaking with the children. And look what my children has done! :) (Of course, its with some help and art direction from me) Enjoy the story!

The Dreams of Four Little Children!

Four best friends met at Steady Readers. They were little children.

Ten years later, Fu Bin called Bernard, Shafiq, Shanice to meet at Mac donalds to meet again.

Fu Bin is a kind man. He helps many poor people and give alot of money.

He also take care of others. He owns POSB bank.

Shafiq is a pilot. He took many people to many countries.

Bernard is a super racer. His racing car is very fast. He will always be first.

Shanice opened a zoo. The name of the zoo is named "Lala Zoo". When the zoo opens, everyone comes in.

Shanice feeds the animals then she will close the Zoo.

They enjoyed doing the work because their dreams came true.

Can you guess if Fu Bin can be a boss? and Shanice can open a Zoo? Shafiq can be a pilot? Bernard can be a racer? Dreams do come true!

~ The end ~

2010-10-13T22:38:00.000-07:00

Updates! (it will be another entry of non interesting details of my life!)

This semster (June to Nov) is really quite busy..not exactly with work, but many other things. We can't wait for my break to come! (we both took leave in December) Jon and my self have so many things..

1) His studies: This semester he is taking 4 modules! The total number of assignments doubled.

2) Our work: I doing every other thing but not really social work. It saddens me. :( Jon is working on his Music Extravagant project and other stuff.

3) Ministry: We started to serve in ASChurch quite actively. I served in the missions & children's while Jon in worship. Its great to serve in the same community!

Waiting..waiting..for the break to come. It doesn't really matter whether we will be going for a short holidays...if we can't find anyone to go with us, we wouldn't be going. But, I am just waiting to really rest and do stuff we like to do.

Anyway, ACS has a church musical which I am directing! :) Jon wrote two songs for the musical. God annoints him :) thank God! The whole of November and December will be rehearsals and filming.. So pray for strength to go through it! I really need it being a bigger project that i usually do. I am thankful to serve the Lord with little I can give. Only pray that I will not be too tired that I grumble or complain. thats not the right posture!

Also, pray that Jon will get through this season well too. He has frequent headaches and it worries me. And, tons of assignments and exams. I am standing by him..pray that I will be of support and encouragement to him during this time of testing. I also pray for God's grace to be upon this season because it can be quite trying for him.

Our HDB flat is approved! Yay! Good news! It will probably be ready in 2-3 years time..judging from what many people say..but it doesn't matter. I am alright with things now n I know God will take care of it. Also, I am alright with Jon's arrangement. He will arrange such that it will be the best for us.

2010-09-23T02:53:00.000-07:00

I was so tired recently :( physically, emotionally, spiritually..... Now, i feel so tired also. I guess I am tired about the events coming up at work and that, i actually didn't really get to do much with the children. Sometimes, I wondered about my job scope. Currently, its 60% Admin/reports/meetings, 10% events, 35% supervision/mentoring of staff, 5% ground work/interaction with children/ casework. I am so not growing in my skills as a children's worker. Well, its for a season....see what's next ba.

2010-07-26T17:51:00.000-07:00

Updates updates.....

I guess nobody really looks at my blog laaarrr..but i would still update because I am actively storing memories. :) I want to remember the good times and bad times..especially recording God's work and faithfulness in my life! :)

1) Time with my brother

I always enjoyed my time with my bro! That night, when we wanted to pray, as usual, we asked each other for prayer requests...

Dawn: Pray for Jon and myself's relationship..that we will communicate well ok?

Matthias: Why must pray for communication? You guys quarrel?

Dawn: Hm...pray loorrr...every couple quarrel now and then.. but communication is so important so must pray.

Matthias: You can don't quarrel mah....

Dawn: How?

Matthias: Just agree with the person..

Dawn: What do you mean?

Matthias: Like that time I went w my best friend and his mum to Universal Studio..they wanted to sit on the rollar coaster but I don't want..but i don't want to quarrel so i just go. Just agree with them.

Dawn: *Impressed* Hm....ok, lets pray :)

Well, of course, we know in life we can't always agree on everything and not have any boundaries. However, to a certain extent, he is right. In many situations, the relationship is more important than our own opinions. And, our opinions are not necessary right.

2) Jon & Dawn
This year has been a unique season for both of us..especially myself. :) I find that the Lord is showing more and more of myself in the relationship, changing me to be who He desires me to be..using this platform :) Months ago, it was about submission..then about respect..words and tone..then about agreement-disagreement etc. I really grew alot :)) And I thank God most of all is that we fix our eyes on God and pray w/o ceasing for this relationship. :) That made us grew closer as we journeyed together. We thank God for everything..even for the good & the challenges.

Holidays is over for Mr Wee!! Initially was still praying for God's grace for both of us as Jon is studying from Mon to Wed while me, thursday night. And, on Fridays nights, i would very much want to stay at home as my dad is home on friday nights. So, I was lamenting over the fact one of my prayer noons..but guess what..the Lord is so gracious! Jon does not need to study on some wednesdays, some mondays and some tuesdays. In fact, its pretty good that there is practically no strianght 3 days study-nights except in October! God is good! :)))) YAY!

3) My heart

Alot of things grieved my heart especially the 10 page spread on churches, happenings at work and also, the state of Christianity in Singapore etc....But, I only pray that my heart remains pure, true and sincere to the Lord. Also, been praying for the churches in Singapore...praying w Jon almost daily on different matters of Singapore. (Children, youth, government etc)

Share w you a song that tugs my heart....

"Surely children weren't made for the streets, Fathers were not made to leave

Surely this isn't how it should be, Let your kingdom come."

Surely Nations were not made for war, or the broken and due to be ignored

Surenly this couldn't be what You saw, Let Your kingdom come

Here in my heart.

And I will live to carry your compassion, to love a world that's broken

To be your hands and feet

And I will give you the life that I have been given

And go beyond religion to see the world be changed

The power of your Name

Surely life wasn't made to regret

And the lost were not made to forget

Surely faith without action action is dead

Let your kingdom come

Lord break this heart

Bridge: Jesus Your Name

is a shelter for hurting

Your Name is a refuge the weak

Can take the undeserving

Jesus Your Name

Holds everything I need "

Amen Lord, Change my heart and not let it die.

Till then,
Dawn

2010-06-27T23:20:00.000-07:00

Death, Grieve...

Just came back from a friend's sister's wake. Life is fragile. There is so much strength, influence, sentiments..joy & pain..alot of meaning..but yet, fragile. I was reminded how lonely death can be for one.

"Even though I walk through the valley of shadow of death,
I fear no evil, for you are with me; Your rod and Your staff
they comfort me." ~Psalm 23:4

Nobody can go through death with you and only God. If you have God in your life, death can be an experience of God's faithfulness.

I was reflecting upon my life..sometimes, i seriously don't know what I am doing with it. Sometimes, I felt that I am wasting my time away..I do want to make an impact with the time I am left with. Nobody knows what is going to happen next. But, I know that the Lord is always with me whenever I go. I trust that my life is in His hands.

Lord, help me not to waste my time away with non important things but to continue to be purposeful with my time & energy. Help me not to waste my life away always thinking about myself but help me to always be filled with love, compassion and serving others. I cannot do without You and I need Your help. I pray this in the name of Jesus, amen.

2010-06-15T22:39:00.000-07:00

Some quotes for my life by Mother Teresa:

"Intense love does not measure, it just gives.."

"Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary.

What we need is to love without being tired."

"In this life we cannot do great things. We can do small things with great love."

"Many people mistake our work for our vocation, our vocation is the love of

Jesus."

2010-06-06T22:35:00.000-07:00

Reminded: Matthew 9:36
"but when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them because they were weary and scattered like sheep without shepherd.."~ Matthew 9:36

I was reminded of the little children Jesus loves when I chanced upon the Compassion Singapore
http://www.compassion.com.sg/ and a voice is needed for His people in the broken world. In these almost 2 years of my role as a children's worker, pioneering children services, i have little opportunities doing stuff for the poor & needy. I knew I was doing God's work...but somehow, I knew something is missing.

Recently, an opportunity came for me to go Batam (short-term missions) to serve the poor & needy. I am looking forward to it. I do not have many mission experiences but hope to use time i have over weekend to serve the poor & needy..My first trip will be on 10th July. I have to work that day actually but have gotten a kind colleague to replace me. Jon said that he will be going with me to support me.. :)

Looking forward.... :))))

2010-06-02T23:08:00.000-07:00

Being Beautiful

Yesterday, (02 june), Jon and I had our monthly devotion. He FINALLY finished his exams!!! :)) YAY! As we flipped to our devotion book...it says:

"Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands.....whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and wearing of gold or of putting on of apparel..but let it be the hidden man of the heart...which is meek & quiet spirit which is in the sight of God of great price....likewise husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife.."

Just the night before as I was running, I was praying to the Lord about some matter in my heart, and I felt that the Lord wanted Jon & myself to talk about the topic "beauty~Inner & outer" We had a long, intensive discussion which turned into misunderstanding but it was clarified quite shortly after. Even though both of us dread conflicts or miscommunications, but I felt that it was all good especially when the topic was meant to be brought up for my sake.

Every woman long to beautiful and to captivate their partner's heart. But, the beauty we are talking about its not just outer beauty but also inner beauty. I too desire to be beautiful. But, beauty is not something to be strife for nor to create. To my understanding, it is really the inner being that can captivate and shine through. I don't think I have it all but the Lord has already blessed & given to me because I have Christ in me. I just need to surrender to Him. :)

When the night was about to end, we prayed for ourselves. I was very touched by Jon's prayer for himself and he didn't know-his prayer was an answer to mine. :)

This post is just to remind myself regarding this special night I had with the Lord & Jon.

Lastly, I leave with this:

God always love us more than we can ever love Him, more than we imagine.

Loved, cherished, treasured and protected by God & Jonwee.

2010-06-02T22:59:00.000-07:00

It has been quite a loooong time since I wrote. As I clicked on my previous blog entries, I was like "WOW..that was quite a journey! & With the Lord." I would very much like to continue to track my growth, learnings & also to remind my myself about it.

Yesterday,(01June) I deeply comforted by the Lord's reminder....

"Yea though I walk through the valley of shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me." Psalm 23:4

I remembered a pastor's reminder during a funeral service that no matter what, we will depart this earth alone. Death is a lonely matter. Who can die with you? Even if your love ones are on the hospital bed, when you close your eyes, who is there with you? I could imagine it as the loneliest period of anyone's life. But, I was deeply comforted by those who has invited Jesus into their life because when they did, Jesus promises that He will never leave us even in the journey of death. I could imagine walking in darkness (shadow of valley of death) and Jesus holding my hands to the light. That's the promises of Jesus. He will never leave us. :)

Thank You Jesus

2010-02-11T22:01:00.000-08:00

CNY dreads.

CNY should be something people look forward to...i mean which season of the year you will be entitled to 2 to 3 days public holiday?

But, every CNY is the same especially the eve of CNY. I specially dread it.

I am feeling so blue about it because the week before CNY, there were quite a number of "stuff". Every year, I will my best to be positive and also, to visit my relatives. After all, even though they are family but you only get to see them once a year. (not much of family right..well, its not really easy to maintain the relationship actually) BUT, this year, I am seriously considering if I want to do the visiting. I know its quite disrespectful not to visit...I am also not keen to go for reunion..because I don't really where to go for now.

I am just feeling so blue now. I hope CNY will be over soon..despite of the good public holiday rest.

I kinda miss Jon now too.

2010-02-03T23:11:00.000-08:00

It has been awhile since I blogged..

Hm. But, i doubt that anyone really reads my blog so..haha..never mind lar. I have alot of updates about life, God and many many things. But, didn't really think of sharing until today. I guess I have been thinking about it. :)

Submission vs Pride

Many things happened in the month January'10 that the time just flew past. But, I really thank God for His constant grace, moulding and love for me. He has been speaking to me alot about meekness, submission and servanthood that the message kept coming back. Usually, when the Lord speak to you about above issues, you feel really uncomfortable. But for me, I really want to work at it. In fact, i have that desire to do so. I really dislike my moments of pride. And I thank God that my eyes were opened to that and my heart aligning to His heart. Thank God! :))

Jon and me

Jon just started his studies!! Gosh. He is overwhelmed. 3 modules a semster is no joke. Anyway, I was all ready to embark on his next season of his life with him. Yesterday, we charged at his first assignment together at Coffee Bean. MAN. All the sociological terms made me so confused. Even though I did the module, I felt so rusty reading his text. Actually, I am a sociology major you know? I majored in criminology, a discipline of sociology. BUT, I am really not an academic person. Surprisingly, we had quite a good time. We discussed, joke, head-ache together, disturb one another ;P. It was fun.
Recently, i felt that our relationship has taken to a deeper level again. It was during November that I felt the deepening. And, yes, these one month, I felt the deepening again. Some emotions are quite hard to describe..I felt that we are just walking this journey together. Whatever major decision we took, we will walk it together. And, that's very nice.
Not like we don't quarrel..due to our strong personalities, we argued quite frequently. However, always at the next moment, we realised quickly that how much we treasure each other & not want to hurt each other..the "Sorries" will come.
I really thank God for this relationship and especially for Jon because he is such a wonderful gift from God. Not just for his good points but also for his bad points & habits. Jon dear, I love you.. :)I thank God because He is also in our relationship. And that I could always rely on God for His help, grace, mercy and guidance.
Sometimes, I would think about the past. And if I made a different decision..what would I be like now? Well, because I have gone through the "desert" and "wilderness", the repentance of a mistake, a growth process..i felt I have grown as a person compared to 2 years ago. I am so convince that no matter what the Lord has purposed for me to be, it will come...the same lessons He wanted me to go through, He would..maybe in a different form. And, His grace is always sufficient for me. That gave me great comfort..I could never live without God.

In terms of other aspects like work, ministries, church etc...I have alot of seeking the Lord, praying and thinking through to do... SIGH. Pray lor.

That's all about me for now.

2010-01-17T22:48:00.000-08:00

Several ways to make yourself miserable

1. Count your troubles, name them one by one-at breakfast table, if anyone will listen, or as soon as possible thereafter

2. Worry every day about something. Don't let yourself get out of practice. It won't add a cubit to your stature bit it might burn a few calories.

3. Pity yourself. If you do enough of this, nobody else will have to do it for you.

4. Devise clever but decent ways to serve God and mammon. After all, a man's gotta live.

5. Stay away from absolutes. It's what right for you that matters. Be your own person and don't allow yourself to get hung up on what others expect of you.

6. Make sure you get your rights. Never mind other people's. You have your life to live, they have theirs.

7. Don't fall into any compassion traps-the sort of situation where people can walk all over you. If you get too involved in other's troubles, you may neglect your own.

8. Don't let bible reading and prayer get in the way of what's really relevant-things like TV and newspapers. Invisible things are eternal. You want to stick with the visible ones-they are where its at now.

by Elisabeth Elliot (from Keep a Quiet Heart)

Want to be miserable? Actively practice the above..if not..do the the below:

Several ways to make yourself contented

1. DONT Count your troubles, DONT name them one by one-at breakfast table, if anyone will listen, or as soon as possible thereafter. Trust God in them. Godliness with contentment is great gain :)

2. DONT Worry every day about something. Don't let yourself get out of practice. It won't add a cubit to your stature bit it might burn a few calories. Do not be worry and anxious about anything and everything but in supplication and prayer!

3. DONT Pity yourself. If you do enough of this, nobody else will have to do it for you.

4. NO POINT Devising a clever but decent ways to serve God and mammon. After all, a man's gotta live by having faith in our God who is our provider.

5. Stay away from absolutes if you have no comment. It's what right for you that matters. Be your own person and don't allow yourself to get hung up on what others expect of you.

6. DON'T fight for your rights. Thats pride. Mind other people's. Thats Grace. After all, you don't want God to think for His rights before He die for you on the cross right?

7.BE compassionate -Everyone needs it. You need it too.

.8. LET Bible reading and prayer get in the way of what's really irrelevant-things like TV and newspapers. Invisible things are eternal. That why You don't want to stick with the visible ones-they are where its at now.

With Words added by Dawn Ang

2010-01-06T01:24:00.000-08:00

Thank God for 2009!

Many many thanksgiving to God for the blessings (highs and lows) in 2009! People may come and go, things may happen but one thing remains: Nothing can seperate me from the love of God. God is always with me, He is never leave me nor forsake me. Thank God for His everlasting faithfulness. :)

Like usual, I went for my personal retreat on 1st January to 2nd Jan went to TTC, rented a room and spend time w God. Check http://www.ttc.edu.sg/ to rent rooms. They have air con and non aircon rooms. Their rooms and toilets are very clean and well maintain. Air is fresh because its near Bukit timah. Its a excellent place to really rest, pray, read and sleep :) A hostel room to stay over. Familar scent, surroundings and just everything..that reminds me of my 9 months stay in TTC in 2008. How time flies.

My necessities for retreats and devotions. My bible (Silver), My new dairy (given by my cell mates), The power of a praying wife by Stormie (I am not a wife lar. But the prayer templates are really good for pray for Jon and sometimes myself.) and new devo book "Keep a Quiet heart." given by church mates :) good book!

I reflected about areas of my life like relationships, God, work, ministry etc and also prayed through 2010. There is no big bang experience but I spent quality time w God and heard Him through His word.

2009-12-22T22:07:00.000-08:00

Birthday Surprise! :)

Thank God that I am 26 years old and proud of it! :) This year, i celebrated my bday in 2 days. Both organised by jonnnniee. Thanks dear ;) So sweet of him.

On 11.12.2009, I celebrated with my friends with a small gathering. :)

Thanks church mates + Jonnnnieee for organising it.

Some church mates, my bro :)The oldies friends. Known me more than 10 years.

This pic is kinda dark :)

On 13th, Jon and I went out. He planned the whole day for me :) Thanks Jon for the great effort to make me feel special :) We started at Escape Theme Park..I ALMOST scared my "heart" out with the rides!

After the Car rideAt the "Haunted House". Not that scary lar. I was creating more effect. haha.

When you have nothing to do during queuing and riding e bus. Our drama-mama came alive!

After that, Jon brought me to this very nice place at Kampong village. Its a Brazilian restaurant. Very good food! :) Love the baked potatoes! Yummy!!

You see waiters bringing out BBQ meats (alot of meat!! Pork, Mutton, Chicken, Fish, Beef..even chicken heart!) After that we went for movie "Frog and Princess" animation. Quite funny and light-hearted. :) Jon took alot of effort coordinating all these stuff..thank you thank you..and my present....

TAAA-DAAAA!!! Introducing Joah!! (its a girl!)

2009-12-02T17:50:00.000-08:00

*Top 5 Desires and 5 Wants*

I am only being human. (sounds like an excuse) as I wrote this blog...Sometimes, i feel unsatisfied, wanting more...but I asked myself what is it that I wanted or desire? I realised that that some things i wanted money can't really buy. Well truly, "Godliness with contentment is great gain."

Top 1 desire: To always be with Jesus.

I want to be like that little girl sitting at his lap! Sometimes I wanted to be with Him in heaven, i think its so wonderful that nothing matters anymore. There are beautiful moments where I was praying and soaking into conversation with Him, nothing matters. Even after prayers, the contentment lingers. Thats what I really desire...

Top 2 desire: Family

I like families especially my own! :) Just last week i went out with Jon's family. Its so nice. :) Not such times happen with my own. In recent years, it does. Last time, I feel strange with families around especially my own. Now, I like it and desire my own! :)

Top 3 desire: A nice house especially bedroom with Hubby

Its nice to come back to a place called "home" where your love ones are. Besides the necessity like nice toilets and living room, a nice bedroom is most important especially the bed. I can't do without a bed that I am comfortable enough to fall asleep in and of course, with your hubby. Great. :)

Top 4 desire: Holiday

Its human lar. Wouldn't you want a nice holiday? I would love one :) Actually, what matters is the people you are going with. However, if its a great place, thats bessttt..!! I like Turkey though..its a good place. However the food is mostly with "Cheese, beef, yogurt.."yummy..but sad for people who re sensitive to dairy products.

I cant think of the fifth one now....

Top wants: (not according to ranking)

1. Sweet & pretty Bras and panties (yep..I would be saving to get them!!)

2. Nice dresses and shoes ( i like clothes! But I am not lacking of them)

3. Kite Flying (would love to do that!!)

4. Retreat with God (Yes! I am so looking forward to a nice retreat at TTC.)

5. Holiday!! (I be gg to it soon)

6. Flowers! (Guess what is my fav flower?)

7. More time with Dad. (eversince i moved to Eunos, I find that I still don't really spend time with him..sigh)

8. Good, nice homecook meal..( i get that every monday ;)

9. To cook a nice homecook meal for people i love (Yes, I really wanna to do that)

...........................

2009-11-24T17:19:00.000-08:00

I felt kinda shock that a friend of mine is leaving the social work scene. I always thought that in social work line, passion drives a kind of calling and a certain kind of lifestyle.

We went into the social work sector around the same time. I remembered we had frequent discussions (even arguments) on our practice. He is very passionate and delicated worker. Now, he is so disillusioned about his work that he is going to leave the social work sector and go into another sector. He told me that he would not go into the VWO sector because he felt he deserved more. I am not in the position to say anything as he does has his own issues and challenges. In anyway, in God's Kingdom, there might be more than serving the poor and needy.

Anyway, i wouldn't know if I would stay in the social work scene for long too. I don't know.

2009-11-15T23:10:00.000-08:00

Baby Dayna

Introducing a new member in my family..Baby Dayna! Isn't she so beautiful? (just like her mummy :)) She may look so super sweet..haha..but she has her moods. Her first few months on Earth was alot of crying for milk and everything else. Now, she moans with days of boredom and always look forward to going out! :)

I don't mind being fat with such a sweet little girl.

2009-11-09T01:46:00.000-08:00

Social Work Diary

I miss those days where I get in touch with the youths and children at risk. Sometimes, their life troubles me. Other times, it inspires me. They are a group of very strong people surviving through circumstances, yet, weaken by the number of issues they are trapped in.

I remembered a mother of 2 sons I have known. Her husband left her when her children were quite young. Before her husband left her, he led her elder son to astray doing drugs and trafficking drugs. Her elder son was caught and put into Boys Home then prison for drugs. She worked very hard to support her younger son. When he was 9 years old, he was diagnosed with leukemia. She has to juggle between working and taking care of her son. Once her son was under remission, she went into depression. Her depression caused her son to be put under temporary care in a Home setting. Thats when I came about to know the case.

She is a hardworking woman who loves her son alot but does not know how to discipline him. She is also engulfed by the difficult circumstances of life, managing to be employability and getting very little pay.

While I was working with the youths and children at risk, it was tough emotionally and physically. Some cases were of many layers of issues and families were going through cycles. I see sad stories. I chase after at risk youths/kids. They hate me for doing that. However, all the time and effort were worth it. I miss working directly with them.

Well, i guess there are different challenges in different job scopes. Now, I am facing a very different set of challenges.

2009-11-05T22:01:00.000-08:00

I am TIRED.

I don't know how to describe how DRY i am feeling now, and I detest that. I sense no comfort from the Lord nor real understanding and comfort from people. Maybe its just that I didn't know how to really express, or i am just dry that I am speechless, or I am complaining that nobody enjoy listening.

I didn't want to complain. Everyday, I pray to God to change my heart, to make me alive again.

Gosh.

Its simply affecting me as a person. And, i detest the "me" now. I am going through the motion in almost everything.

I am really wanting a real break away. I just had my leave last wednesday but I felt more tired. I think I need a longer break. I look forward to my retreat with the Lord. Its going to be a real great one. Its going to be on 01st January. I will probably take more days.

Now, I just want to go MIA everywhere and not see anyone.

2009-10-28T21:32:00.000-07:00

*New Blog!*

www.jonanddawnjourney.blogspot.com

Check this out. It is our blog.

2009-10-27T01:21:00.000-07:00

A New Journey in ministry

Well, actually I couldn't imagine that I am stepping down from the leadership of Beloved Group soon after 6 years of leading, planning and doing almost everything.

How Beloved started?

Indeed, Beloved represented my re-kindled love for the Lord 6 years ago. An terrible mistake that I made brought me back to God and made me realised that He is my Beloved. :) I started reading the Bible and I could read for hours as though every word came into being. It was an unforgettable experience for me. My friend, Janice has been encouraging me in my Christian journey. That time, we started to give other bible studies. When we do bible studies, we invited our friends who are non christian to join us. The Lord became real to them and they became Christians! Jon was our first worship leader then. :) (Tee-hee)

The ups and downs

My journey in the Beloved Group is tied closely to my growth in the Lord. There were alot of tears, alot of disappointments, alot of joy and smiles :) In the process of serving the Lord, I remembered crying before my co-workers about being weary and tired, wanting to give up, and sharing how discouraged I was. I also remembered moments of very difficult times in my personal life and how I still have to tell myself "God's mission raises above all." Times where I cried before the Lord and feeling completely drained. Now, these remained fond and learnt lessons.

First public speaking experience

I also experienced my first fruits in sharing the gospel to my friends. Almost all my close friends came to know the Lord! Also, my first moments of sharing the gospel infront of 20 to 40 friends! I always felt so nervous and like a fool. (Haha!) Those were my very first public speaking moments. ;) I have done it for 6 years for now. The joy of sharing the gospel and giving bible studies is so great. Those are the moments that I grew. Yes, i remembered those times where I saw sea of 80 to 100 elderly from York Hill and Henderson gathering for our events, blessing them, conversing with them etc.

"My Beloved is Mine and I am His." ~Songs of Songs

My journey of serving in Beloved Group is coming to an end. Indeed, it is a faith adventure of knowing and serving my Savior, Jesus Christ. It has been a privilege.

What's next? (That whats everyone has been asking!!) Will shall update you soon :)

2009-10-21T18:42:00.000-07:00

The beauty sleep

I am a light sleeper. Whenever, there is loud sounds, i couldn't sleep well. When I sleep over at my mum's place, she snores like a mini train and I couldn't sleep well. To my surprise, I could sleep despite of the alot of sound yesterday night. That tells me how tired I am.

I haven't been sleeping well past few days and decided to sleep early last night. (The doctor gave me some pills to make me drowsy..but I don't feel so lar) Guess what..i slept so much that I woke up feeling alittle goggy. To my surprise, the whole house was in a mess. Tables flipped and my shoe rank over-turned. Some bowls were broken and utensils were all over the floor.

A "hurricane" came upon my place yesterday....

2009-10-20T03:17:00.000-07:00

I AM SO TIRED!!!!

Aaaahhhhhhh....i am so super tired. I have so much responsibilities and it tires me out. I am actually glad that the year is coming to an end. I don't know if I have done my best as a human being... :( I know it sounds weird..but I kept trying my best in everything I could.

As a daughter?
As a sister?
As a girlfriend?
As a friend?
As a leader of Beloved?
As a HOD in Children's?
As a colleague?
As a cell member?
As a church member?
As a child of God?
As a Christian?

I know i can stress myself too much. BUT, i am going to just relax again. Today, I shall go back and watch TV, run (okie..i got to force myself for this) and hope that I could sleep well. (I don't seem to sleep well at my mum's place)

Today, also think about financial stuff again...not that I am in need. Recently, this things surfaced. I guess at the end of the day, even how much i give a thinking and planning to these things, nothing actually change. I already did my best... However, in the morning, i just told myself to "Trust God!" "Enough is enough."

Ok, this post is intended to be real cause I am kinda tired.

2009-10-07T02:40:00.000-07:00

I chanced upon a blog where a couple who lost their child when he is only a few months old due to some medical complications. The story just touches me. Just reminded me how little men are.

"As for man, his days are as grass: as a flower of the field, so he flourished.
For the wind passeth over it, and it is gone; and the place thereof shall know it
no more." Psalm 103:15-16

Indeed, i was touched by the love the couple has for the baby and their trust in God. I am sure when the baby died, it was the saddest day of their life (literally as how the mother puts it) but they still praise God.

There is always a reason to praise Him because of who He is. And, circumstances/situations might not appear so, (to be easy and smooth) but, somehow with God, He makes it His burdens and not ours. For example for me, no matter how i felt sometimes, there is like an inner strength that pull it through. People call that "Resilience". I call it "My Resilience is in Christ."

I felt it doesn't help to be inward looking or to think about how you feel or think...it doesn't mean not to attend to feelings but i guess not to dwell overly with it. Well, for me, i would like to learn not too.

Come on..come on..its time to move on.

2009-10-05T17:57:00.000-07:00

Shopping time!

Not that i dislike shopping. But, usually the moment i have gotten my pay, i have other priorities or financial committments that the list of things i want to buy appeared insignificant and unimportant. Sometimes when i do window shopping, it gives you the mentality that you actually don't have enough or you are in lack. Thats how the shops position themselves. I also couldn't understand one could buy very branded goods as it appears all the same to me. Well, maybe because i might not have that kind of luxury so i don't really know how is it possible.

I advised myself to create a shopping list....(below items are actually not a NEED but a WANT)

1. Appropriate working clothes. (Shirts x2, Pants x1, Skirt x1(Below knee)
~I have a huge problem with this. Corporate apparrel don't appeal to me! And, I always reason within that i should get something that i would wear casually and work so that i am not wasting money.

2. Casual Clothes. (2 x dresses, Cardigan x1, Shorts x1)
~Because i used my casual clothes as work clothes, i end up having not much casual clothes. What a confused messed up girl i am!

3. Shoes! (This is a NEED)
~My shoes damages every few months because I am born with "Destructive feet Syndrome"

5. Mascara
6. Face Foundation
7. Eye Liner
8. Perfume
9. Facial Package and products
10. Vitamins and supplments for my dad
11. Bags to keep stuff
12. Nice nice Bras and undies :) (haha)

the list goes on...

2009-09-29T22:43:00.000-07:00

Sooo tired.

I have been feeling so tired lately. :( Spiritually, emotionally, physically and mentally. *Sigh* Nothing very major happened that resulted the after-math of these feelings. Its the usual, i would say.

I am someone who don't really share much of the details why i am down or whatever.. not because i don't want to. Just realised that it might not be so necessary & maybe, i don't know how.

However, i just want to thank my loveliest man, Jon who stands by me despite of how difficult things can be. Well, he continues to lead, take care, love and cherish me through and through. Thank you so much, love.

Signing off...

Dawn

2009-09-25T02:52:00.000-07:00

Little Get-away with the Lord

I started the day with my favorite mushroom mince-pork noodles at Blk 1 Eunos! Its makes me salivate when i think of it now. (Feeling hungry..) Its simple yummy! If you are a soup person, you must really try the soup. Its great and has been there eversince i was a child. I love the noodles eversince I known good food. (Haha..you know how to make me happy :) Just get me noodles from that stall! I have a list of favorites from different places. I am so predictable! Not that they are really nice but its just makes me happy when I eat the same food at the same place with the same person. Its represent some kind of memory and sentiments that makes me both hungry and happy. :D Haha..i am kinda weird.

Okie, enuff of food. Then reached East Coast for a get-away with God at around 11plus. Nice weather caused i prayed ;P (The usual prayer would be cloudy, no sun and no rain) I spent time reading the bible and talking to God till 5plus! MAN. Its one of the longest session i had. Of course i had toilet moments, distracted moments and Coffee Bean moments ;)

I spent time confessing my sin through Psalm 19 and prayed about some stuff i wanted to talk to God about. Sigh...sometimes, i seriously wonder about stuff He spoke to me through His word and prayers. REALLY! Since the sheep hears the shepherd's voice, I sometimes wonder if the verses and thoughts I had was from God?! Anyway, I wrote them all down and await for more of Him ya...

The most important thing out of this get-away is simple being glad in Him. Sometimes, I don't think i don't have to say anything or hear anything from him. Being with Him is very good to me. Joy is filled my being seriously. I can be very happy.

Thank you, Lord. I want to be close to You forever. I am glad that's Your desire too. :)

2009-08-29T03:49:00.000-07:00

His 3 good news!
First and foremost, a congrads to my dear bro, Matthias for his completion of Level O1 for bible memory verses! He has successfully memorised 25 verses! *clap*clap*

My brother is so cute today. I went to fetch him from tuition class and when he saw me, he looked really happy and exclaimed "I have 3 good news for you!" I eyed him with curiousity. "What good news are those?" I wondered deeply whether they would be good news for me or for him.

"I have been looking forward to see you and tell you." he continues. I nodded, feeling appreciated and honored for that.

"First news: I have a new best friend! I prayed to God that Joshua would be my best friend and he agreed! All thanks to God!" Yes, he really said that..especially the part "All thanks to God!" The background information behind this best friend thingy is that his former best friend just left for Vietnam and he is feeling alittle lonely in school. He told me that there is none to go recess with him. He likes Joshua and had no courage to ask Joshua to be his new best friend. But, during recess one day, he prayed to God in his heart to give him courage and for Joshua to agree..and in the name of Christ, he went to ask Joshua! This child agreed readily! Indeed, it is a very good news for us!

"Second news is that my former best friend in vietnam will email me. And he emailed me twice! Thank God."Again, i am amazed how this boy goes to God for his daily affairs ;) and God is very faithful and gracious to answer his desires ;)

"Third good news: I prayed for God to help me improved my English, and the teacher say i am doing well! I have three good news this week and all God help me and all thanks to God!" He exclaimed. I am really excited about his good news not really because they are good news to me. But i could sense his trust in God and that, God is so real to him! And I know anyone can be skeptical whether God really answered his prayers. But this boy believes that is serious about his prayers!

Matthias exclaimed that made my day "I think I should pray even more to God." he smiled. "Why did God answer my prayer all the time?" he shrugged curiously. "Because God loves you and I. And when we ask believing that God will answer and He is a very powerful and good God, He answers our prayers!" Matthias smiled "Yes, he is a good God :)"

I am thanking God because my weekly tuitions and prayer/bible time has sown seeds in his life. My mother doesn't allow my brother to go to church even if he asked many times to. I told him that he must continue to pray and read God's Word because God really like that. He says he could only wait till he is 18 years old to go to church. My brother and I have been praying for the salvation of our mother and for him to go to church. I believe in God that He will answer our prayers. :)

"Dearest God, thank You for Matthias' growth and life. I thank You because Your relationship with him is not about him going to church but about Your faithfulness, goodness, love and grace when he gave his life to You in faith a year ago. We love praying to You because we know that you are so real and so wonderful to us. Every time we come in our kneels to pray, it made us so happy and it makes you happy too. Please continue to make my brother a person that loves you, seeks after your heart and serve You for the rest of his life. In the Name of Lord Jesus, Amen!"

2009-08-24T23:03:00.000-07:00

For Late Comers. We all waits.

"Therefore will the LORD waits, that He may be gracious unto you....blessed are all they wait for Him." ~Isaiah 30:18

Do you have a friend who is always late and you have waited for him/her for hours? Well, personally, I have waited for friends for hours and I do grow frustrated. But, i don't usually fret up because I am no punctual person myself.

Many times in Christiandom, we know of waiting..

~we are waiting for the Lord's timing

~we are waiting for the Lord' to answer our prayers

However, do you know that the Lord also waits for us?
We should not only understand the importance of our waiting on God but also realise something even more wonderful~ The Lord waits for us. And the very thought of His waiting on us will give us renewed motivation and inspiration to "wait for Him." It will also provide inexpressible confidence that our waiting will never be in vain.

The Lord has an inconcievably glorious purpose for each of His children. "if this is true," you ask, "why is it that He continues to wait longer and longer to offer His grace and to provide the help i seek, even after I have come and waited on Him" He does so because He is a wise gardener who "waits for the land to yield its valuable crop" and is patient...for the autumn and spring rains." God knows that He cannot gather the fruit until it is ripe, and He knows precisely when we are spiritually ready to recieve the blessings for our gain and His glory.

What can the Lord be waiting for you?

~The Lord is waiting for you to come back to Him. You have gone far away and He is waiting for You graciously before He needs to pull a big one on your life for you to realise how much you actually need him.

~The Lord is waiting for the best time to answer your prayers.

~The Lord is waiting for you to be ready to recieve His blessings

~The Lord is waiting for you to be gracious to you. And, when He does that, you know that.

~The Lord is waiting to change you.

~The Lord is waiting for you to seek Him.

Rest assured that the Lord waits longer than we desire, it is simply to make the blessings doubly precious. Remember, He waited 4 thousand years, "but when the time had fully come, God sent His Son." (Gal 4:4)

2009-08-24T03:34:00.000-07:00

Dreaming of a REAL Get-away.....

I wonder if its actually alright to spend money on holidays. I haven't been on a real holiday for quite some time. The previous trips were mission trips to Thailand and those were quite tiring ones. (even though its still a holiday for me)

What does a Holiday means? (according to dictionary.com)

1. A day free from work that one may spend at leisure, especially a day on which custom or the law dictates a halting of general business activity to commemorate or celebrate a particular event.

2. A religious feast day; a holy day.

Hm.....Okie. I conclude, i am really looking for a get-a-way to enjoy, relax and play..nothing else.

What do i really want during my get-a-way?

1. To just not even think of work, responsibilities, ministries.

2. To sleep w/o alarm clock.

3. To play like anything i want.

4. To enjoy cultural sights.

5. To enjoy sceneries.

6. To travel as little as possible. (Means No Long bus rides)

7. To enjoy reading.

8. To enjoy companionship.

9. To be the dawn i actually am.

10. To get away from everything.

Option 01: Dreaming of Vietnam.

I actually really like countries like Thailand, vietnam etc. Deep down in me, I am a historical and cultural lover. I like to indulge in historical landmarks, sites, religious buildings and to be able to imagine to era and the stories behind the architectual designs. I kike Vietnam because of the Vietnam war and also, much heard of its political culture and history.

Back-packing to Vietnam would be sooo a dream come true! But, i am saving and studying next year and might not be able to go to Vietnam so soon.

Maybe in the end of 2010? (HAIZ)

Option 02: Tioman Island

Tioman island is one place for a getaway trip. I cannot go to places like Bali, Batam or Bintam..Bali is too spiritual and not worth the risk.. Batam, i gone once and its soooo boring. Bintam, i have gone once and its really nothing much. Tioman is next up for more reasonable prices and relaxation.

Option 03: The trip almost impossible: Turkey

When i was a young lass of 17 years old, I bought a air ticket to Turkey and plan a backpacking trip for 2 weeks with a conservative amount and yes, alone!!.. (How daring!) But, why am i richer at 17 years old than now?? (I also don't know..the older you get, more financial priorities and responsibilities and yes, expectations from everyone) Then, it got bombed...and I encountered God that very same season too which drove me back to the Lord. So, i didn't manage to go..

But the dream never left..

2009-08-20T02:59:00.000-07:00

.Regrets.

If only I surrendered wholely to the Lord, every aspect of my life that I know that mistakes would not be made. Only then i realised a while ago that these mistakes were something I must carry a whole life through. No doubt i was forgiven , healed and set free, but scars will always remain.
Now all i want to do is to hold nothing with me but to surrender everything to Him. Deep in my heart i know, its the best way to live and His ways I trust. I go through everything to be as close to the Lord and will do according what He pleases.
Its actually too late for regrets. Those times of rebellion and ignorance. I could only start living, faithfully, humbly walking with the Lord. I am afraid to go astray but Lord, please help me. I do not want to live a life anywhere apart from You.
I need You, Lord.

2009-08-12T20:43:00.000-07:00

A typical day @ work..heehee.

2009-08-11T20:07:00.000-07:00

emo-ing.

2009-08-11T17:53:00.000-07:00

Psalms 37:23-40

The steps of a man are established by the Lord, when he delights in his way;though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the Lord upholds his hand.

I have been young, and now am old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken or his children begging for bread.He is ever lending generously, and his children become a blessing.

Turn away from evil and do good; so shall you dwell forever.For the Lord loves justice; he will not forsake his saints.They are preserved forever, but the children of the wicked shall be cut off.The righteous shall inherit the land and dwell upon it forever.

The mouth of the righteous utters wisdom, and his tongue speaks justice.The law of his God is in his heart; his steps do not slip.

The wicked watches for the righteous and seeks to put him to death.The Lord will not abandon him to his power or let him be condemned when he is brought to trial.
Wait for the Lord and keep his way, and he will exalt you to inherit the land; you will look on when the wicked are cut off.

I have seen a wicked, ruthless man, spreading himself like a green laurel tree. [4]But he passed away, [5] and behold, he was no more; though I sought him, he could not be found.

Mark the blameless and behold the upright, for there is a future for the man of peace.But transgressors shall be altogether destroyed; the future of the wicked shall be cut off.

The salvation of the righteous is from the Lord; he is their stronghold in the time of trouble.The Lord helps them and delivers them; he delivers them from the wicked and saves them, because they take refuge in him.

2009-08-10T22:57:00.000-07:00

Tree-top walk!!!

It's National Public Holiday!! And Jon and I planned to walk Tree-top together. Jon stays very near Mac-ritchie :) so its pretty near for him. My hair is so re-bonded!! Haiz. I like it because its different but I wish it will quickly grow longer. Anyway, we walked like 8KM to 9KM. I was wearing new slippers and my feet has some blisters. (OUCH.) Anyway, we both preferred Southern ridges because more sights..more enjoyable.. :)
Mac Ritchie is a frequent place we go :) but this is the first time we are walking all the way in..

Macritchie: most pretty place I think.

Jon and I. Jon slept at 2am the previous night...see how tired his eyes look..haha..Super panda eyes.
**STOP SHAKING the bridge!!** hahaa..playful Jon..

Our journey. We like taking our feets. Hee. Catch those awful slippers. (Blah.)

I was so exhausted that I went back home around 6plus..ate dinner and slept at 7pm till 7am the next morning.. :) Okie. I do like sleeping..but thats what public holiday are for, right? Jon slept at 11pm.. :)

2009-08-10T22:37:00.000-07:00

Desiring the Fear of The Lord

Its my first time completing minor prophets.. *phew* Other than enjoying the shorter books..(Heezzheez), my final lesson came from the last book of the bible, 'The book of Malachi'. It was written for the Israelites who has taken God's honor for granted. They have been doing religious stuff and their lifestyle has not really shown it. The Lord detested their "worship" and "offerings".

There are many things I learnt and really liked about Malachi...but I am only going zone in to the question the Lord posted for the people of Israel :

IF THEN I AM THE FATHER? WHERE IS MY HONOR? AND IF I AM THE MASTER, WHERE IS MY REVERENCE? (Malachi 1:6)

We can sing and act as if we really respect God or we really love God...but God is the Holy God and deserve all our honour and praise...

1) How many us really tithe regularly and faithfully with honour and thanksgiving?
2) How many give the best time of the day to spend time with the Lord?
3) How many us really fear the Lord and think about Him when we make every decision?
4) How many of us really think about the Lord when we burst out in anger or frustration to our family, love ones and friends?
5) How many of us really honor Him by honoring sabbath being found in church?
6) How many of us make the Lord our Lord of work, relationship and aspects of our life?

I truly repented for not honoring God for who He truly is. :( Thank God He is all-forgiving and loving..but we cannot take His grace and Love for granted because He is just and holy too.

I desire the fear of the Lord because I know with the fear of the Lord, i can do things right before His sight and that is the ONLY way.

"Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.."(proverbs 1) that is sooo true. Wisdom means to do things right actually...Its amazing how i understood and even desire the fear of the Lord.

"Dear Lord, forgive me for not honoring You for the way You are. Strengthen me and help me to live in Your ways. I pray for the fear of the Lord to come upon myself and Jon-dear so that we can live right before your eyes. "There is many plans in a man's heart but only the Lord's counsel will stand..(Proverbs)". Indeed, unite our hearts to fear Your Name so that whatever we do or whatever decision we make, we will fear Your Name first. Thank You, Lord."

~In the Name of Christ Jesus, Amen

2009-08-05T18:16:00.000-07:00

I am looking to hear a word from the Lord...........

~06th August 2009

2009-08-03T04:51:00.000-07:00

Austin Hill Pleasures and Pressures.

I went to JB Malaysia, Austin Hill golf resort a few days ago. I was looking forward :) getting out of work and Singapore.... (although its a work retreat) Well, i didn't really expect 8 hours meetings everyday (for 3days!!) We hardly go out off the function room other than lunch, dinners. I came to the Lord on the last day praying for shopping time!! Praise God for His goodness. It was granted..heez.

The lift lobby..the golf course was stunningly BIG. The rooms were BIG. The ceilings of the lift lobby were HIGH.

The dinning area was spacious and nice :) We had breakfast here.

My favorite part of the retreat is spending quiet moments with God at the Golf course. I was looking forward every morning. :) I tried gym the first morning but its unsatisfying. The second morning i tried jogging. It was a good run :)
my boss. working hard...when she does, all of us must too..haha

my dear colleagues during breaks. Food perks long meetings. ;)

Overall, it was a great retreat not because my brain was fried with meetings after meetings. But, i am glad to fellowship and pray with my fellow colleagues. They are really funny at times. The last day, we got lost at Malaysia while driving back..hahaa...because of my colleagues' GPS. Hm...wonder now if its trustworthy. (Maybe its the roads of Malaysia..!!)

I was alittle dis-oriented back in the office...had a couple of things to do but don't know how to start..... Haiz.

I am going to plan a REAL holiday. (some get-a-way to a secluded place.)

2009-07-23T02:42:00.000-07:00

7 Love re-attributes

When 2 people come together in a relationship, its always never easy. There will clash of differences in personalities, perspectives, way of doing things and yes, even expectations. Jon and I really treasured the relationship God has given to us, so we came up 7 re attributes (according to the Holy Bible, our guide) in managing this relationship :)

Nevertheless, in a relationship, one golden reminder: "Less expectations, More grace."

There is nothing sweet in relationships but the reality and practicality of two in love coming together, protecting, treasuring and caring for one another.

2009-07-19T19:16:00.000-07:00

Down..down..down

I need a break. I am tired.

Yesterday night, i slept at 2plus. I can't sleep with all the noise. I look terrible for a few days already. I have gotten irritated by those noise and I went out trying to "settle" it. I couldn't stand it.

he will lose my respect. Does it have to go this way? I know i don't have to take it seriously. I easier to 'honor' without experiencing it.

You would have told me that i should expect it, get use to it. Why should i?

2009-07-12T21:23:00.000-07:00

My leader, my comforter :)

You are such a wonderful leader and example, and someone i could lean on.

~never fails to express his love for me

~protects me

~never respond in anger to me even though he is angry

~tries his best to care and provide for me

~leads by godly example

~takes responsibility of all my needs (including spirituality)

~always sends me home even though he doesn't stays near and doesn't have his own transport

~Prays for me, my work and my family everyday :)

Jonathan = God's gift.

Indeed, you are God's gift to me. Well, God promised me that He will bless me with someone who will love and cherish me, that we will be instruments in His Kingdom.

You are my very best :) Love ya so much

2009-07-12T20:57:00.000-07:00

What does it look like to honor our parents?

I used to think that I was pretty alright in honoring my parents. I mean after such a long time of mess, God truly brought about a changed relationship with my mum and dad. I felt I could esteem, care and love them more than before.

Today, i ponder again after going through some horrible nights. I still ponder deeply, still shiver alittle bit after thinking about it.

1) How do you not go into a stage of INDIFFERENCE with your parents?

If you stay with your parents all these while, you will reach to a point of indifference. It means, you get on with your life then, they with theirs. You don't really bother about their life. Sometimes, its even nice to NOT have them around. Is that really honoring them as what the Lord has commanded? You don't even bother their existence until something major happens. Because i don't stay with my parents for a long time, i know about this "indifference". But now, I had a worser issue. I am scared when my dad comes back.

2) How do you not ARGUE with them?

We all know that we are not always right..and our parents too. And, we will always try to insist our points. It can be irritating to have parents who nags non stop. Even if you try your best to do what pleases them, it never seem to be enough. I am really not sure whether its the mentality, culture upbringing or that, parents are usually like this. But, to be wrong infront of their children is something quite embarassing for parents. They want to appear right. For so long, they have been telling you what to do, to guide you. Once we reach a certain age where we want to make decisions on our own, i guess parents don't feel so safe about it.

My simplest solution is to NOT ARGUE, and keep quiet. (even if they are at wrong or saying something terrible) I seriously help the situation alot. In my case, my parents know that they are wrong actually. I just don't want to embarass them.

3) To show LOVE?

This is tough especially for Asia culture. We are terribly shy people and for our parents, to show love is to give money monthly and provide for them. That's how they show their love to us. If you can, that would be good. (even a token would be good; but they will nag still.) Sometimes, i know you don't even feel like showing love....and simply just want to ignore the fact that showing love to our parents is a responsibility of a child. I find this aspect difficult actually. Am working on this too. I think there are tips:

1) Eat dinner with them?

2) Do house work?

3) Be there for family gatherings?

4) Call them?

5) Buy things for them?

6) Talk to them?

7) Listen to them; give them your attention? (Don't give advice at all)

Any tips to contribute?

2009-07-06T18:09:00.000-07:00

Those were the days.

I suddenly remembered my days in Polytechnic. I thought, compared to Secondary school days, I was much reserved and quieter, and i didn't quite fit in.

I was in Temasek Polytechnic, Design school pursuing a degree in Interactive Media Design. To me, it was God's grace for me to get into the course. There were only 75 seats in that course. In order to qualify for the course, you need to go through an creative test and interview. I seriously think i didn't do well for the creative test. Compared to the rest, i am not creative.

When i was waiting for my turn to be interviewed, i saw the others bringing their drawings and paintings. Some were really very good. :( Then, i compared to mine. AW. Let the ground swallow me! I knew i couldn't go into an engineering course. My O level results was quite bad. Only 4 passes!! Actually, i couldnt qualify for MOST courses! Well- I just prayed and asked God to help me. Immediately, there was a peace that settles in. :) God is good to me. He gave the place in design school for me.

Well. I didn't really fit in to all the rest. But, Jennis Li was the first friend i met. I am somehow attracted to her because she was quiet and different. We clicked :) Afterwhich, Jennis and Melissa...we became clicks. We were called the umbrella ladies. Hahaa..because Jennis would always carry an umbrella around. She wants to be fair!! We were weird trio~Someone commented seeing us together. Yet, we clicked. :)

Jennis was the cool gal. She pierces her chin and had a great sense of design and ideas. Her style was cool, retro :)

Melissa was the nurturing Christian gal. She draws very very well. :) Everyone calls her "Mama Lemon.." Cause she look really nurturing. :) And, she is so good with her visuals.

ME? I am the odd one. They say i look brave and daring. :) Yep. I am the story-video girl. Many many stories in my head...but i suck at design.

We are the umbrella ladies and we dreamt dreams. We wanted to go to Germany to study.... :) I dreamt of doing stuff together :) For Jennis and Melissa, they would want to further their design studies in Germany..studying the language too :) How romantic!! For me, I like film and would want to study that :) OR, just to try working in overseas. :) HA.

Guess what happened to us after 5 years.....?

Jennis....She is REALLY in Germany studying design! I am not sure what she is majoring. I guess, in her blood, it's really for the beautiful things and to make things more beautiful :)

Melissa. She is in Australia studying nutrition :) What a difference! This gal got talent. She can design, draw, play sports well, cook well and now, she is going to determine people's diet :)

ME? You know what is in my blood. I guess the poor, oppressed, needy and community will always be in my blood. That's what i am living and dying for.

We all dreamt dreams. Miss you, gals. Hope we can catch up again :)

2009-07-01T23:02:00.000-07:00

J Master and family

We looked like farmers? Hahaa...

2009-07-01T18:39:00.000-07:00

AIP blues.

OOOooooo...feeling blues about AIP.

"The Lord only builds a bridge of faith directly under the feet of a faithful traveler. He never builds the bridge a few steps ahead, for then it would not be one of faith. We live by faith, not by sight." ~ Streams in the Desert.

If you kinda know me, you would have known that I am planning some youth stuff + Media&entertainment. I reached to the "blues." I know what I am supposed to do, but, I am alittle stuck. Questions come by......

a) I don't have a pool of media/entertainment people to start off with.
b) Coming up with a youth mentoring w/o the these people's input & the skills training part is abit raw.
c) I need inner/outer/heavenly strength & motivation to do what i ought to do. To research, to read what i research, to think and design, to use my brain.
d) my personal deadline is within these few months. By dec, i should be linking up to that school. By January next year, we should start something.
e) Is it the right time to start because i am alone?
f) But, i can't shake off the responsibility and burden from the Lord.
g) Uncle Chris Tan comes to my mind......
h) OKIE. I don't know what to do.
i) But, i am still so super excited over it. I WANT to do it.
j) But, i have nothing to start with.

GOSH. see my thoughts?

Being alittle Blue-ie. I need encouragement. I need partners-at-work together. I need God.

2009-06-24T19:09:00.000-07:00

The excitment of Beloved 5th Anniversary!

Thank God for our 5 years adventure :)! We gathered on 20th June @ Naked Fish to celebrate His faithfulness, glory and love. Thank you Jan-dear for leading and organising the whole event. :) Thank you all Beloved members for the labor of love for these 5 years and also making this event possible. I hope you have enjoyed yourself. Thank all who joined us in fellowship and celebration. Indeed, its a privilege to have you to be with us.

Lovely bottles done up by Elaine for our Amazing race prizes. :)

Us!

Amazing race of Beloved planned by Jan-dear :) Participants has to answer a list of questions about our journey from 2004 to 2008. *Phew*

Me with Gunawan, our longest surviving member with "indian" origins :p

Me with Jan-dear, co-founder of Beloved Group. It has 5 years, dearie! Thank you for growing together in the ministry. Love ya!

Once I have the microphone....i couldn't stop talking..hahaa...

Me and Uncle Chris, our overseerer of Beloved Ministry. We hold accountability to him

Gunawan, Hanwen and Weien :)
J Master, our guest performer that day. When he sings, my heart just melts :)
He looks alittle sleepy..haha.. love you so much Jon.. :) I am your greatest fan :)

Stay tune for more updates on Beloved Ministry :)

2009-06-22T21:20:00.000-07:00

The J Family

Little Jon. He came in early february :)

Jonster (the bear look-a-like) and Hamham (the pig look-a-like) came in May

The J Master himself :)
J Master n me & the dear Thai kids whom we miss. :)

Well. It was five years ago when I meet J Master. (aka Jonster and Jonjon)Hm. That time, I just came back to the Lord and Beloved Group just started. He started a music ministry and was passionate to serve the Lord. Jan-dear was involved in his ministry and asked J master if he could lead worship for us. Yep. During practices, my impression of him was very good that i never forget about him all these years :) We didn't keep in contact only to see him again a few years back at a University fair and then this year. It's strange how things sometimes happen. Both of us went through seasons of chastening and here we are, crossing each other's paths.
I remembered when Jan-dear called me a few months ago ...

Jan-dear: "remember Jon from excite? remember that guy whom you could communicate so well with?"
Dawn: "Yes, i remembered. Why?"
Jan-dear: "he msned me on MSN and invited me to visit his church."
Dawn: "oh. we can visit together. I wonder how he is like."
Jan-dear: "Ah-huh. What if you meet him and something happen? Heez."

And so, the Lord has His plans. :)

2009-06-15T22:38:00.000-07:00

Gaga-ing over dogs and girl-hood day :)

I finally met my dearie-Jan after a long few months. :) MAN. You disappeared for awhile! Anyway, after church, Jan, Jac, me and Patrick went for this dog fair at fort canning. My first time seeing so many doggies...there are so many types!

I was so shocked seeing such a special dog around...I was like "Ooooooo......take pic!!"

His curly tail is not spared from my camera..Feel like touching right?
Spotted Handsome lad o2! He has special eyes~ Blue at one and black at another. :)

Ok. Jan wasn't happy with this shot. Sorry lar.

.....Because she is happy with this. Haha...!

And the girlies.

2009-06-08T03:19:00.000-07:00

Moved :)

I have altogether 9 packs. Out of 9, 3 packs are clothes...(GOSH) I used my muscular-not-look-like-it arms to carry them down to my void deck. Cool orh.

I feel like a prodigal daughter. Well, the first few days was a breeze but after that, it didn't come easy.. I guess i have to get use to it. I couldn't let situations like that affect me or i will be constantly affected. It's not good. :( Thank God for Jonster who is by my side or i know things wouldn't get better. I am determined to pray and intercede for the best of Jonster and my family. I wouldn't give up even though things will get tough. Just like the persistent widow in the bible, I would hold fast to Jesus.

2009-05-28T23:46:00.000-07:00

Moses experience~Haha :)

Moses should have a loud hailer to command people who always talk among themselves..haha..

I just had my "Moses experience". Today, my colleague and I organised a Southern ridge walk with a neighborhood school. It's a bonding session for the teachers and school staff. In all, there are 155 of them. I positioned myself infront while my colleagues were at the back and the middle. As I was leading them through the walk, I seriously felt i Moses, looking at the whole massive people following after me. SUCH huge responsibility! Although adults, some walked ahead, complained about being tired, hungry..asked many many questions..like:

1) Where is the breakfast......?

2) Where are we now?
3) Which way to go?
4) How many kilometres more?

5) What time is the bus coming...?

6) Why is the ice cream so expensive..?

many many questions............... and not all of them are co-operative (when it comes for games and group activities, some sneaked off, don't want to play..strange sight)...complained about food and everything.. -_-" haha.

God so fierce meh? Haha..i think he must be really angry with the grumpy people...

Why is Moses with a lap top?

I wonder:

1) How did Moses substain the complaints with only Manna everyday??

When we went back for lunch, everyone (in 5 MINS TIME!) queue up in 4 STRAIGHT LINES to await for good food! You could have imagine their satisfied faces with meat. I wonder, how did Moses appease them with only Manna..? No wonder God is angry with them!!!

2) How did Moses give instructions to such a big mass? He needs a loud hailer!!

I have a loud hailer to give instructions and get attention. :) (thank God for technology) Maybe Moses has a loud voice..haha....

3) Did Moses has a back person to sweep the rest?

I have my dear colleague to watch over the "sheep" who walk slower than the rest. Do you think Joshua postioned himself or Caleb maybe?

4) Moses, Joshua and Caleb must have alot faith to follow the Pillar of cloud by day and fire by night. They don't really know where they are going..you know!! And people ask and complain all the time!!

~Okie. End of "devotion." Stay tune and read Exodus for background and Numbers 11-15 okie?

2009-05-27T23:53:00.000-07:00

Who is Jon-Ster?

Introducing "The Jon-sters!" The one with the J, his name is Jon-ster! He is mishievous, excitable, loves to sing (esp when he is bathing) and disturb his fellow friends...(AW. Jon-ster..wouldn't you behave?)

2009-05-24T17:59:00.001-07:00

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints, and also for me, that words may be given to me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains, that I may declare it boldly, as I ought to speak.

2009-05-12T22:22:00.000-07:00

When everything strips away, what is left?

What is the most important in your life?

What counts when you are at your last breathe?

"Godliness with contentment is great gain." ~1 Tim 6:6

2009-05-11T23:04:00.000-07:00

Written in September 2009

Just to share with you again to tie in with the previous blog

What i think would be a necessity in a relationship?

~God is in the relationship. It means He is the LORD. He must or I wouldn't want to be in one.

~Right person. A friend said that it's not a hving the right person but how you manage the relationship and build it to last. I beg to differ and saying that it must be a balance. He must also be the right person too or you can be in a relationship with anyone.

~For him to love me beyond me, treasure me because I am his [not to rule over me or neglect me..], committed and faithful to me..

~I will choose to respect, love, be faithful, submit and follow him. His family will be my family. Who he loves, i will love. Where he chooses to go, i will follow.

~Not to give each other up [it's hard but with God, it can be. God never gave us up, isn't it?]

~To always choose forgiveness [ there will always be quarrels, hard times and circumstances]

2009-05-11T22:00:00.000-07:00

Love: A lifetime of choice and committment

I took this picture while I was on my way to my dad's place. It's a beautiful sight that an elderly couple still together, holding hands and walking home after exercise. Do you know how wonderful it was to witness that?

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up." ~Ecclesiastes 4:9,10

Just as i pen this down, i recognised how difficult it is to find that kind of companionship and love. I am not really saying about friendship. There is a reason why God created Adam, and it is not good in His sight, then He created Eve. It is all the goodness of God's plan. The difficulty comes when storms of life, different expectations, temptations etc and waiver that committment and love in that relationship.

Love is a constant choice to forgive, bear one another, esteem one another and to respond in loving words and actions. Love is a constant choice to commit despite the storms.

If you have found that someone today (the person feeling mutual) treasure him/her because it is God's goodness and grace that has happened. Hold on and don't give up.

A prayer for your relationship: (pray alone or with your partner)

Dear God,

I pray that You would protect this relationship with (name:_________________) from anything that would harm or destroy it. Shield it from our own selfishness, sin and neglect, from the evil plans and desires of others and the evil one, from unhealthy or dangerous situations. May there be no thoughts of seperation. Set us free from past hurts, memories and ties from previous experiences and relationships, unrealistic expectations from self and others. I pray that there be no jealousy or low self-esteem that precedes that. Let nothing comes into our hearts and habits that would threaten the relationship.
Unite us in a bond of friendship, committment, generosity and understanding. Eliminate our immaturity, hostility or feelings of inadequacy. Help us to make time for one another, to nurture and re-new the relationship. I pray that (name:____________________) would be so committed to You, Lord, that his/her committment to me will not waiver, NO MATTER WHAT STORMS COME. I pray that our love for each other will grow stronger everyday.

In the Mighty Name of Lord Jesus Christ we pray Amen!

2009-05-11T05:40:00.000-07:00

"Lord, i just learn something tonight about love. I pray that You will help us to love. I want You to bless my sister and answer what she has asked. Teach us how to love. Help me to study hard. Help me not to be proud. I praise You for Your love, kindness and power. In Jesus Christ Name I pray, Amen."
~Matthias, 8 years old

"Lord, thank You for answering my prayers. Thank You for Your love, faithfulness and goodness. Please help us to truly love and forgive us that we have not love esp me...Fill our hearts to love in Your way. Bless my bro and help him to work hard. Make him a godly man, a wonderful man in Your sight. You heard my cry for the rest of the morning, noon and evening, my cries towards something so important...i rather not eat, not do anything but keep praying to You about it..... I praise You. In the Name of Lord Jesus I pray, Amen."
~Dawn Ang, 25 years old

Tonight we learnt....(esp for me. A real lesson, a reminder)

1 cor 3:4-6

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always PERSERVERES.

Perserve on because it was 4 years ago. Perserve on because it was the Lord's hand.

2009-04-15T22:56:00.000-07:00

Last night, enjoyed myself walking down the memory lane at Trinity Theological College, looking at the beautiful cross i fixed my eyes upon. This time, i came back with much difference. Every night i go back, i would keep looking at the cross while climbing the stairs up. I would talk to God..."i miss you so much, God. Why don't You take me Home to be by your side?" I don't know if anyone would totally understand how i felt. It was such a lonely moment then, and yet, bittersweet because God is with you all the time. It's sad for me because i know His total presence is not on this earth and that longing for a real Home to be Him who loves you so much.

Last night, i went back again and once again, the memories of 9months at TTC flooded back. I guess that season was over. The scene at TTC reminded me of what i have spoken to God about when I met Him up for our special day on 1st January 2009. Yes. An act of honoring Him first before anything else, to give Him the first fruits above all else.

This morning, i woke up at 10am (i woke in noons on Mondays and Thursdays) and went for a jog. I came back praying and spending time with my Love One, remembering Him and also moments in TTC.

"Dearest Father in Heaven, You are my dearest. I miss you everyday and NONE can replace You. I know whenever I miss Home, I simply miss being with You in the totality of Your presence. My Home does not dwell on earth with people who does not love me as much as You do. I want to thank You for blessing me so much, and everything, every aspect of my life. I am well favored by You, and Your favor and blessing followed me wherever I go. I do not deserve it but You simply gave unconditionally. You have also made it so different for me when I returned last night, with warmth in my hand, no longer in solitude and tears but with love that i don't really deserve. Help me to honor You with my first fruits, and to serve You wherever You have called me to. Help me to desire You more and more, not a deer panting for the rivers. I don't want to stop. I love You, my Father in Heaven."

-In Jesus Name, Amen

2009-04-13T21:14:00.000-07:00

Holy Discontentment

I couldn't count the number of times I have spent time with God and ended off crying because of the state of luke-warmness we are at. No matter how many times I asked for forgiveness and plead for mercy, this message comes back everytime. We have totally missed the reality and the totality of the world.

We are not desperate enough for the coming of Jesus because we have known how perverse, how wicked, how broken the souls are. We have been blinded by self-centeredness, by materialism, by cosy church fellowship, by weekly Sunday service and by our so-call service to the Lord. I know i sound extreme but why is the Holy Spirit prompting me all these times about it? I have 'seen' (through praying) brokeness within people, poor, oppressed, needy, unjustice, wickedness.

Because of my ISTM (Instant Short-term Memory) I wrote down almost every impression and reflection i have: (here goes; I am sharing what the Lord impressed upon my heart. It's the same everytime and i end up being burdened.)

"We have become more and more irrelevant to the Spiritual battle we are supposed to be in. I felt that the church has taken a back-seat in terms of making a real difference in the world. How Lord?"

~03/04/09; After CS music Songwriting showcase

"The world broken and we are fallen.
Hearts desperate for hope
Dejected and rejected
Families fallen apart.
Children are hungry
Many wrecked with perversion
Total insanity

Let's wake up
to the hope we can claimed
To live like what He has called us to be,
to reach to the broken like we ought to be

Jesus, we are desperate for you.
Do you hear the cries of this broken world?
Jesus we are desperate for you.
Empower us to reach for you."

~ 05/04/2009; before sleep

"Cease to do evil, learn to do good;
Seek justice, rebuke the oppressor
Defend the fatherless
plead for the widow." -Isaiah 1:17

~12/04/2009; before sleep

"Sorry Lord. We have not been desperate enough for You.
We lived in comfort and satisfaction. Where is the holy
discontentment we should strive?
To cry for injustice, to weep with the oppressed, widowed and suffering?

We have not been desperate enough for You.
To truly believe that You can make a difference
With Your touch, even bones can revived.

Come to us as we draw near
Open our eyes to see what You see
and ears to hear what You hear
Break us Lord and helps us reach for You."

~14/03/2009; Prayer day in office

Seriously. I don't know what to do with all these messages. The Lord hasn't said anything on what I can do with them. I get them all the time. (Same type of messages)

Updates on what I am doing:

To break the bondages of the marketplace (arts, media and entertainment) and redeem it for Christ's sake is what the business Jon and I are praying is all about. So, pray along with us as we fine-tune it. Jon, let's continue to press on for His glory. =)

Serving Him only,
Dawn ang

2009-04-03T01:06:00.000-07:00

~ Inadequency is necessary

Inadequency is neccessary. This is a week of many reminders of how unfitting and inadequent myself can be and I embrace it with much thought and reflection. I wouldn't mind being looked upon as one or to be treated as one as to further push me to say to myself "I would continue trying to be qualified for what I am purposed to do."

As I was reflecting upon leadership, (as I am currently reading Good to Great by Jim Collins) humility and will is the top level 5 leadership. It is not someone of dynamic, talent and charisma (celebrity leaders) but humility and will~to put the cause/mission/vision above the personal ego and drives it regardlessly to achieve greatness in his/her company. It's the simplicity within the complexity. I haven't fully digest it but savoring it slowly.

It boils down to my point that inadequency is neccessary. In this week, it has caused alittle irritation and it bruises my pride/ego to realise how inadequent I am and that many am agreeing to it. But, i am still driving the cause no matter what to the best that I could grow, know and drive it, with clear conscience that I have to answer to the One who has purposed me to do so. Throughout, i am praying for the One to help me embrace it with meekness and gentleness.

I have been praying about other things too. There are many on-going stuff I am engaged in and quite excited about it.

2009-03-30T21:15:00.000-07:00

21 suggestions for SUCCESS by H.Jackson Brown. Jr

1. Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery

-This is soooo true. Who says there isn't a right person? Well, make a responsible and wise decision. Do not let feelings rule your head. For me, talking to God about it helps.

2. Work at something you enjoy and that's worthy of your time and your talent.

3. Give people more that they expect and do it cheerfully

4. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.

5. Be forgiving of yourself and others.

6. Be generous.

7. Have a grateful heart.
-Contentment with godliness is a great gain. 1 tim 6:6

8. Persistence, persistence, persistence
~Excellent suggestion. Don't give up on something you believe in. It might take a long time to see it come to pass but hang on.

9. Discipline yourself to save money even on the most modest salary

10. Treat everyone you meet the way you want to be treated.

11. Commit yourself to constant improvement.

12. Commit yourself to quality

13. Understand that happiness is not based on possessions, power or prestige but on relationships with people you love and respect.

~When you on the bleak of death, it's people by your side.

14. Be loyal.

15. Be honest.

16. Be a self-starter

17. Be decisive even if it means you will sometimes be wrong.

18. Stop blaming others. Take responsbility of the every area of your life.

19. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you will regret the things you didn't do more than the things you did.

20. Take good care of those you love.
~Yes. How important

21. Don't do anything that wouldn't make your mum proud.

~I saw this in Thailand, Bangkok Airport =) I thought they are very good suggestions!

2009-03-23T03:27:00.000-07:00

Thailand (Udon Thani) March 2009

We are back from Thailand!! It has been a meaningful, fruitful and great time at Thailand. Initially, I planned to go to Thailand in January 2009, however the trip was cancelled due to the rush in Chinese New year. =) I was very glad I went. I was also very glad and thanking God for both Jon and Huihui whom came with me. =) Anyway, thank you ,Jon that you push everything aside and make time to go with me. And, also Huihui whom took leave and is now my constant companion to Thailand. =) Am so glad for both of them.

Day 1: Departed at 6plus and reach Bangkok at 8plus. Was feeling so sleepy throughout the plane journey that I slept throughout. But was happy to have a cup of Moroccan Mint Latte and apple crumble before boarding! That's my dinner. =)

Was playing with Jon while waiting for passports to be chopped at Bangkok Airport. Haha..aren't we so funny? That's what really happen to people who are waiting around and have nothing to do. =) PLUS. Both of us are high in "I" on DISC profiling..so we are the same "type". Heez. After settling the stuff at airport, we rush down to "Santanee" to take a night coach to Udon Thani. It's a 9 hour journey. We are scheduled to reach at 5am.

Day 2: 5 am in the morning. We were waiting for Aunt Jane to reach. Meanwhile..while we have nothing to do, we take pics again! We were all pretty tired after the bus ride. The toilet in the bus is really bad and i think we don't smell so good after being in the bus for 9 hours. :( I was looking to bathe and smell nice!

Nice scene isn't it? 6Am at Udon. Still waiting for Aunt Jane. (taken by Jon~the hands of a musician makes a difference) After reaching Aunt Jane's place, we cleaned up and spent some time with our Thai friends at church and night market. Great food, great friends and great fellowship.=) Thank you Paow and Chep for the hospitiality. At night, we met up to go through the worship songs and before nights off, Jon and I watched "1/2 a dozen" on my lap-top. Real funny. ;D

Day 3: Was about to go to Good Life Home. Before we leave, we took a pic with Aunt Jane, Uncle Pra Mok, Joshua at their garden. This family is really great. Bless us with all the good food, good hospitality and time spent despite that Aunt Jane is unwell throughout.

Day 3: Reached GL Home. This is our official team. Paow~our super-duper funny and cool translator. She is such a joy to have around and very very serving. =) Huihui~our directory and also English teacher. =) Jon~Our worship leader, the kids fav (REALLY: the kids were all calling jonjon..) and the only man (Which means he carries all the heavy stuff) and me..(haha)

Day 3: We conducted small group English reading sessions, worship songs, played games on the 1st day.
Jon and my fav girl at the Home. She is only 6 years old but really pettie and super cute. Jon adores her so much...haha..=D

After our day ended, we met up, de-briefed and prepared for the next day. It was so funny to rehearse with Paow on the story-telling segment. We can truly make a "Angkrit" / Thai team haha..=) Thank you huihui for always being so encouraging and supportive..love ya! Watched another VCD "In-laws something.." with jon at night. =D Hm. was really feeling quite bad that we weren't so quiet about it. Hahaaa

Day 4: In the morning we woke and continued our workshop. This time, some community kids came as usually, saturdays would be an outreach for the Home to invite the other kids to join them. We did some worship songs (it was very very fun), story-telling, English sessions and games. =)

Another of our fav girl. I took a pic of her last year. =)

SOOO CUTE right? heheee.....
Huihui and Paow in action with the English book.
Our talented worship leader, Jon in action..=)

Jon is not only a worship leader but also he likes to play with the kids alot. =) (Although in this pic, the kid looks like he is being kidnapped..hahaa..)
Day 4: We are about to leave GL home and the finally smiles and farewell. We took a bus back to Bangkok (9hours again) and reached Bangkok at 5am. GOSH. so much time at hand that we......
Day 5: We played "Have you ever?" at the airport. Our plane is at 2plus and we have soooo many hours to kill. Guess what we did? Many many things. we didn't have time and strength to shop in Bangkok...we played, laughed, wandered and slept at the airport. Ohhhh..it's so tiring. But overall i really enjoyed every single moment with my dear friends. The story doesn't end here.

When i reached Singapore, i realised something is licking from my luggage. It's milo. Don't ask me how. Just do not put a packet of milo ever again in luggage or anything fagile. It wouldnt survive through Tiger airways. I can't boycott Tiger airways because it offers the cheapest flights to Thailand. (Maybe i will take Air Asia or Jet Airways) However, we spent 1 hour cleaning up my luggage and the mess. Thank you huihui and jon for standing by to help. I think my face looks sulky. =(

Wondered why am i sooo accident prone. I could really remembered the number of stuff i spoilt or spilled for this year or i injured myself (Now it's only march) I could spill milo on the carpet twice...spoilt my shoes a couple of times...jammed the laminating machine...hit on my head while folding the table...hit on the wall while i walked...fall somewhere..MAN. I really am irritated of myself. However, I am POSITIVE. I shall proclaim the wisdom and help of God in my life...do i hear an Amen from you???

2009-03-17T06:31:00.000-07:00

Some pics taken professionally and it is very well taken. Me and my very handsome brother.

I like flowers very much. =) So nice and sweet

Well. Aside from the fun taking pics, i was doing a camera job on my aunt's wedding.

Me and my beautiful mum. We look alike?

Me posing. Haha. I like to take pictures.

2009-03-15T23:06:00.000-07:00

I just want to be where you are

Dwelling in your loving presence

I don't want to worship from afar

I just want to be with You.

The midst of the usual business comes my only thought and desire: It's enough being with God. There might be 100 + 1 things to plan, to think and accomplish. There might be pressure. deadlines and struggles. Yes, they are not bad stuff and we learn to strive with it. However, the most important thing and thing that i would never want to give up or neglect is being with God. And, i rather give up everything else but to be with Him. The thought of being with Him is more than anything i want in this world and beyond.

I felt that in TTC throughout the year. I have been alittle lost for awhile and now, i am found to be close to His side again. All the rest of the world actually doesn't matter anymore. =) Now, I have this peace of moving with the pressure and tons of things i want and need to plan, think and accomplish. Well, I am listening to my Abba Father on what He purposed me to see to it.

And, last night. A dear friend asked me "What about you? What can i pray for you?" My dear, i want you to pray that the very best would come to you because my burden is that I want the very best for you. =) I really mean it.

Anyway....looking forward to Thailand =)

2009-03-13T03:06:00.000-07:00

Seriously. You can't live perfectly. There is no situation to please everyone. I re-consider and think what does it mean to esteem and think about others before yourself. Well, esteem is a posture and attitude, but in reality you can't give in and please everyone. Pardon me. I am not preaching but simply sharing experiences and lessons i haven't quite embraced totally as a skill, lifestyle, a principle.

+ To be able to live with failures and courage to take it up again.

+ A perspective not to subject to the pressure of others but clearly to know what would be best and stand by it.

+ To consider at all levels; Pros and cons, and thereby making a informed, prudent decision without being pressurized by the challenge of time and people.

+ Pressure isn't good if it doesn't make you a more resilient person but a slackened and timid one.

+ Submission doesn't mean always to be agreeable and compliant. (how true. I am still learning submission at all levels.) I think submission is a posture of esteem of the higher authority and leadership, an attitude as well and obedience and support to the final decision despite disagreeability.

+ Foresight is a value. It's alright to take a longer time to make decisions and analyse. But it does not excuse ourselves from being indecisive and afraid to make mistakes.

+ Prayer and counsel serves you a LONG way. I know what it means.

+ Performance is not measured by how on the ball you are, how quick you accomplish a task.......Performance is being a good steward on the task you are given, with thought, action and time.

2009-03-09T00:48:00.000-07:00

~ OFF tmr! (10th March 2009)

WAHHAAA.....i am off tmr! =D

2009-03-06T01:20:00.000-08:00

+if there are more than 7 days a week.......

I am feeling bad about the decreased amount of time i spent with some of my friends which resulted into some stuff. =.( I also missed spending time at 'home' with the kids. =.( It has been 3 weeks since i gave them bible studies. How can I be a blessing to them? I haven't catch up and pray with them for awhile. God, please help me.

BUT. I thank God very much. Despite of my very much desire to play and rest, I am very thankful to God for many things. I am in the position to do what I like (and get paid), provide myself and others, bless and be an impact to others all the time, good relationships w everyone, good health and so on.....God has safe-guard me from the financial crisis for now, and I am very thankful. I guess i don't really have much to lose..(HAHA) My family is not really affected too. God is good to me.

God always hears me and answers my prayers too. He really loves me alot. I don't think He ever stops that. It's FAITHFULLY, ETERNALLY, ALWAYS. Who would love you like He did?

So, I concluded. Even though i might be dog-tired, bored, (cause i don't have time to play) upset (because I cannot give bible studies to my friends/kids) but I am STILL blessed and I am contented with what I have.

YAY. What a great perspective to take.

2009-03-01T21:09:00.000-08:00

~Updates

+ I realised that I am quite overwhelmed at work.

+ I am flying to Thailand again! =) (18th March to 22nd March) This time, i am going back to GoodLife Home.

+ I have to make an important decision by end of March'09.

+ I am excited over a new idea and project. I am praying over it.

+ Once again, I am back to meeting God regularly during lunch-breaks to seek Him for some matters.

+ I have another important decision to make by May'09, and this, I have asked God for an answered prayer as an assurance.

+ Someone has stepped into my heart recently.

Some Desires

+ Rollar Blading by the beach =)

+ More hours to sleep

+ Take leave to rest

ps. WARNING: For those who aren't close to me: You are free to read but not free to ask/tease/comment to me. Yes, i mean it before i make it a private blog that nobody can read. Thanks for the consideration

2009-02-26T04:15:00.000-08:00

My bro's time with God =)

Last week, Matthias and I sat down cosy on the bed all ready to pray. The usual question was "Any Prayer Requests?" I confessed my missing God moments...not hearing His voice for a week or two..

"You mean you can hear God's voice? How does he sound like?" Matthias inquired curiously.

I explained to him that God do want to speak to His children. We concluded that both of us would very want to hear from God, so our prayer focus that night was desiring to hear His voice.

Guess what? This week, my brother shared with me that he dreamt of God talking to Him! And I firmly believe it was God that has spoken to my dear brother!

"What did God share with you?" I asked, bursting in excitment.

"He shared something about me and something else. I asked him some questions and He answered me."

WOW. I was praising God for His favor and goodness that He answered our prayers. My brother and I felt so deeply thankful and also recognising the reality of God even much more. With greater faith, we prayed for bigger and greater things, knowing that God hears us.

Really love the journey of faith with my brother. =) I am always driven to do more, share more, pray more and love more when i see someone coming to know how lovely God is. I love investing my life into life. That's what I live for.

2009-02-21T22:06:00.000-08:00

Let me introduce "Little Jon"......=)

This puppy is my constant companion @ work...=) Nice to hug, cute and adoringly sweet..HA! Makes my day @ work =)

2009-02-19T02:56:00.000-08:00

Looking Forward to Monday...=)

I took leave on Monday! Am really going to rest well. =) I have been so tired. My energy level runs low fast everyday now. (Don't really know why)

What i really want to do on Monday:

~Switch off my phone? (Cannot lar. Work doesn't permits)

~Have ice-cream. =D ( if it's hot! I gg to pray for a great windy weather)

~Spend time with my daddieeee..(miss him!)

~Spend time with my Heavenly Daddieee..(miss Him too!)

~Go rollar blading =)

~Drink Whiskey Dry @ night?

~Wake up late....and go for a jog =D (*refreshing*)

~Not think about anything that kills brain cells =) (i come to a conclusion that many things is beyond us and there is no need to think but let time pass.)

~Just be the happy ME..=)

Sounds like a great plan ?

2009-02-17T19:17:00.000-08:00

ZHPS (Zhenghua Primary) Kids

Today is the start of the SMS kids prog (Student Mentoring Scheme-Kids) and I had a great time hanging with the 13 children @ recess time! I saw a few kids which we ran progs with them last year. One of them was so happy to see me that he came running to me and sticked with me throughout. (AW...i miss him too!) It was really really great talking to the children and build the relationship. They feel really special cause now they have a cool lady in bright green (my uniform) paying attention to them. Everyone was telling me about themselves and what happened to them that i hope I really have many ears to listen!

I am soooooooooo excited to be in school with them!

2009-02-16T02:02:00.001-08:00

The SUPERs in rainbows....

I am SUPER exhausted after the previous weekend. (14th, 15th febs)

I am SUPER tired looking at my work calendar for 2009

I SUPER miss God. I did spend time with Him but He hasn't spoken to me for a few days. =(

I need to make SUPER important decisions in a few months time.

I SUPER need time to for hear God. God, I MISS you.

I SUPER need time to sleep w/o interuptions. I know what i mean.

I SUPER need God's wisdom and anointing for my work and ministry.

The Delights...

I DELIGHT to share the love of God during V'day. I went w/o notes but with the Holy Spirit. A Challenge for me: Next time all sharing NO NOTES!

I DELIGHT in the surprise a friend gave me. The puppy's name shall be yours.

I DELIGHT in working. It's contradicting I know cause I am so drained from it. But, imagine life transformed, Church being bridged and Christ being glorified, nothing beats it all.

I DELIGHT in the special friendships built. Yes, very much.

I DELIGHT giving Bible studies to my dear bros and her kids @ home.

I DELIGHT seeing the people in Beloved serve God and assuming responsibilities. It's a vision of every leader to make him/herself out-of- job and dispensable. It's the PEOPLE that counts not the program.

I DELIGHT hearing from God. Once again, i cry...God i miss you.

The wannabes and desirees....

I DESIRE to know how I am feeling.

I DESIRE to know what God is saying. (*Important *)

I DESIRE to know what he is thinking. (Only I know who)

I DESIRE to have more time to play.

I DESIRE to spend time with my daddy. =(

I DESIRE to sleep well.

I DESIRE to have God's desires.

I DESIRE to hear God lah. (Hahaa..i know I nagged @ this aspect. But, He really didn't talk to me for a while leh)

I DESIRE to go for holiday, away from everything.

I DESIRE ice-cream. =D ( Mr Bean..greentea flavor, Ben and Jerry's (just knew it's really nice), Yumi Yogurt..really yummy)

I DESIRE to go kelong and slack.

I DESIRE to sit at a cafe to read and reflect.

I DESIRE to paint with water-colors..

I DESIRE to read history again..(AW. back to the good old historian days)

I DESIRE to know him

~ with much super delights desires..
Dawn.

2009-02-10T02:30:00.000-08:00

Thank God for Lawrence who managed to get a good lobang from Safra Toa Payoh, blessing 46 residents from York Hill for a good Chinese dinner, games and goodies. Thank you Esther for being there too. My heart is for the church to reach out to the needy community.

More work to be done for York Hill =)

2009-01-22T01:53:00.000-08:00

I am inspired....=)

I happened to know the wife of this man. They are in my church. This man, Mr Huang is the founder of Heartware network. With a only 8 staff but a huge pool of volunteers and has done many good works. WOW. It's a success for VWOs. (Voluntary Welfare Organisation). However, though inspired by Mr Huang, i esteemed his wife more because and truly, behind every successful man's back, there is the support of a successful, supportive and big-hearted woman..and she is also one woman with leadership, depth and capabilities. But, putting all her talents into serving and supporting her husband and children..that is sacrfice of a Godly woman. I am so glad that her husband treasures and loves her.

WOW. i am inspired and would learn from her if I can.

It happened a long time ago in China where a pair of newly-weds were honeymooning. The young man was a representative for a company that he worked for and the wife faithfully remained at his side, learning the fine art of culinary skills, beginning from labouring 4 hours to prepare a dinner (while the man slept waiting) to eventually whipping up dinner parties for a dozen people.

This man loved his home country and would spend his leisure time promoting her good name and his company’s image. It was disheartening on numerous occasions when he realised that many of the 130 foreign representatives from the same industry stationed in China was ambivalent about his country and the insignificance of this “little red dot of an island passionately the young man called “home" ". More stunning were the remarks made by a fellow countryman he met while celebrating their nation’s 33rd National Day. The man, who had worked overseas for 17 years in multinational corporations, was obviously a good family man with one wife and 2 or 3 daughters. However, when asked what he would do if danger befell their homeland, the man remarked that his primary responsibility was to move his entire family to another country and nothing else mattered

That remark left this young man troubled. During his 2 and a half years in China, he was more troubled as he saw that there were even lakes bigger than his homeland, mountains higher than the highest peak at home and at one point, even experienced hundreds of thousands of young people protesting on the streets over the bombing of their embassy overseas. I

magine these people protesting against his homeland, he thought he was also awakened by his Prime Minister’s remarks that people actually thought of his beloved country as a 5-star hotel, checking in and out at their convenience.

Nevertheless, the young man and his wife were encouraged by the selfless contributions of other countryman and women serving their overseas community, putting in their personal time and money and without asking for any certificates of appreciation. These were the people that had to be dragged out to take photos with the VIPs.

Yes, the young man thought there was hope.Seriously, dear friends, if you have not guessed by now, I was the young man in the story and that beautiful wife is still my beautiful wife and a good cook today, I must affirm.

~taken from http://www.heartware.org/

2009-01-21T01:36:00.000-08:00

Reconcilation?

For all who do not really know me..i really value people in my life. Some people are there for a season of your life..some are for a lifetime. I do work hard and intentional in building relationships with people.

Was at a corporate devotion todaes and my colleague went through an relationship mapping exercise. I realised how more important people are to me. And, i might need to reconcile some.

Should I reconcile with him? Is it wise now?

There is a timing for everything. I only prayed for myself to take the wisest move in hope for the best of everything.

2009-01-18T18:08:00.000-08:00

Jesus loves me like nobody can

Had a night with God. Was feeling upset, frustrated and worthless for quite some time. Nobody knows it except for God and He told me this and I teared:

Dearest Dawn,

I have been desiring you. I have been loving and caring for you. I have been protecting and treasuring you. I find you special. Eversince you were a child, you have found favor in my eyes. I know it had been tough for you, growing up but I have never left you. You are always on my mind. When I wanted you, you told me to "go away." When I drew near, you ran away. It hurts me to see you in pain, going in circles everytime. I have keep breaking you to bring you back to Me.

Remember what I told you before and now, I will remind you. "I have love you with an everlasting love and with lovingkindness i have drawn you."-Jeremiah 31:3. There is only ME who would love you like nobody did. I am faithful and I would never leave you. Remember that I always love you."

Always and Agapae,
God

2009-01-14T00:22:00.000-08:00

I have the Spiritual gift of discernment that i could literally "SEE" the moods of everyone. HAHs..like below. =D

Hms....HAHAs.

2009-01-08T19:17:00.000-08:00

January Birthdae Babies~My Belovees!

We celebrated @ naked Fish Shoppe! Great place, Great staff
Great food!

Me and the Bday Babies~Lawrence, Jan and Elaine =)

Me and Janjan~Glad you are happy that day!

Me and Flown-back-fr-Australia~Klement! Miss you, Bro!

2009-01-05T23:27:00.000-08:00

Retreat w God

If circumstances allowed, as much as possible, i would like to spend time like how i did last yr and this yr~my every 01 January of every year with God. Without question, it was an amazing time. He is close. I was lookg forward so much to being alone with Him for a long long time, just conversing with Him about stuff. =)

My Bible and Prayer Diary ~The Necessities! =)

Day 01/01/2009

I had a late new year eve BUT, i look forward to not sleep in the next morning and spend time w God. I am soooo excited. I went out to Naked Fish Shoppe (a restaurant) to settle some party matters. Then, i started my retreat there with the very favor of God. The manager of the restaurant blesses me with two expensive cocktail drink. (I seriously don't know why) Thank God for His favor and assurance that He is with me. I sat there praying and reading His Word. It was really good because He impressed upon my heart to give Him the best and first fruits for the year. I mediated on the thought "What are the areas I could give Him my best and first fruits?"

I reached my actual retreat chalet @ a super-pretty place. I forgot the actual name but it's was really a blessing! =) Imagine my excitment! I spent the rest of the evening just talking to God about some stuff. I don't really know how to describe the details but I felt the peace of God throughout. There is no big bang experience w Him but just being with Him, close to Him is really good enough for me.

The pretty place I am in. Have to take a pic for memory =)
Spot my breakfast? Heez.
Day 02 02/01/2009

I spent my morning in reading His word and cycling at the beach. It was great weather =) thank God. I was alittle frustrated w Him that day, bringing some questions and confusion to Him once more..it was some question marks in the past. God is very very gracious to answer my confusion awhile later. I am very grateful.
Pretty pretty view?=) Finally! My retreat partner..thank God for her!

God has allowed open discussion with me on an aspect of my life. I am really happy about that. Wells. I don't know how to explain further how I had that impression but I knew that We were b more conversations =)

Dear God,

I look forward to talk to You every time. You are so amazing and I like to listen to You too. Sometimes, I wouldn't be able to understand Your ways and thoughts but I am assured that You are always with me and has seen me in Your Son, Jesus. I have found favor in Your eyes even though I don't deserve anything. Thank You, Lord.

We can never doubt the goodness of God.

Amen?

2008-12-25T18:19:00.000-08:00

As the year counts down...i thank God for PEOPLE!

Lawrence! Thank God always for you!

We are beautiful, rite? Thank God for ALL Melissas.!
My dear Elainea! I always thank God for you!

Josh! Ehm guess what is his fav hobby? Thank God for your thoughtfulness

Mr Eric Matthew Sng! Haha =D Thank God for you!

Junwen! One funny and cute guy! Thanks for e sharg!

Miss Huang! Thank you for all the laughs and chats.

Huihui..thank you for all e sharings and your listening ear

IVAN!

NL staff

Me and Florence =)

My Boss =) thinking or dreamg as usual

My dearest dear Mummy who loves me so much!
My lovely, cutest and sweetest bro, Matthias!

My cooking 'Shi-fu', Lynn

My bestest friend, Guna (he is REALLY fr India!)

My dearest dear Daddy who loves me very much =)

I am THE apple of his eyes!

Jonathan who taught me many lessons! Thank you!

My crazy bestie and drama-Mama Jan Jan. We can talk about anything and everythin My church-mate, Yanping =)

My Sheeps in Beloved ! I love ALL of you

YESH. Life is like a journey and people come, people go. Many, I am proud to say, they stay w me throughout because we treasure each other =) As the year ends, I am reminded. I LIVE to GIVE and people are the most important people in my life. Let me take some time to thank and love them =)

Thank you mummy and daddy for loving me sooo much! I love you and i promise i will honor, serve and spend time w you!

Thank you Matthias for being here with us. I love you sooo much! I will nurture you, teach you, love you more and more ya?

Thank you my der sis. You are in Shanghai and i hope you take care ya? Love ya!

Thank you my besties. Elaine, Janjan, Guna! I love you very much! Sorrie for my craziness sometimes!

Thank you Belovees. Law, Ruth, Lingli, Hanwen, Junwen, Esther, UncleChris, David......You all made my serving days so meaningful and fruitful. Thank God for all of you!

Thank you my colleagues in NL. Nelson, Josh, Eric Matthew, Kelly Ice-queen, Ivan, Florence and those in HQ. Truly a blessg from the LORD

Thank you all in YMM. Weichin, Jeremiah, Jonathan, Yanping and Yanqin, Rusiynni, Drew for your welcome and kind hospitality.

Thank you all youths in YOUTH HUB! Our paths crossed!

Thank you all in Beyond Social Services! I haven't forgotten you guys!

I have many many to thanks! Thank God for all of you! If i didn't mention your name, don't b angry hor.

2008-12-19T21:22:00.000-08:00

*Resilience is CHIRST*

-Taken on 1st Dec/Southridge Walk

I thought i wouldn't be able to sleep after i moved in to my new place. But, I slept very well. I teared when i unpacked my clothes and moved out. Then, i didn't tear anymore. I was very joyful and happy to be at my new place. I slept well every day and every night I spent time with them. I am giving the kids Bible study soon =)! I love it when i can share about how wonderful God is. My resilience is in CHIRST. I gotten use to it so soon. I even enjoyed being with them.

16th Dec. I prayed and decided. I thought I wouldn't be okie, but I was. =) I guess my resilience is in CHIRST. He pulls me through. I am filled with HIS JOY. I love YOU, God.

19th Dec. Well. I feel alittle jittery that night. I don't know why. It's strange. =)

11 more days to go before I end my Promise to God. Help me to be faithful to YOU.

2008-12-12T00:28:00.000-08:00

Ending my Covenant(Promise) with God in 19 days

Wells. Maybe it's time to blog because i haven't blogged in a while. I am counting down like everyone else to the end of the year. But, for me, I entered into a Solemn promise with God and myself in the sort-of beginning of the year...and this convenant (promise) was confirmed once more in August 2008. Written down solemnly.

2008 is EVENTFUL with God. It's just so many ups and downs that my heart almost dropped..Hahaha. Thank God I didn't die of a heart-attack! Yes, It's really many many ups and downs. How do I really describe how eventful it has been?

+ Uncertainties. Still having it. There is peace in uncertainties.

+ Transformation. Me and the Relationships.

+ Pain. I am living w it now.

+ Contentment and Delight. Whatever, whenever, whichever. I delight in God.

Look @ what God spoke to me for the past 1 year 2008:

January: "We WAIT in hope for the LORD. He is our help and our shield."-Psalm 33:20
Msg: Let GO and Let me do the work. Wait upon Me.

February: "I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of living.
WAIT for the LORD, Be strong and take heart and WAIT for the LORD."-Psalm 27:14
Msg: Be confident of My goodness because I am good. Wait upon Me.

March: "Because Your love is better than life. My lips will glorify You. I will praise You as long as
as I live, and in Your name I will lift up my hands."-Psalms 63:3-4
Msg: I am your FIRST LOVE. Worship Me. I am pulling you out of why you are at so
that I will be with you, without distractions. I want to restore and heal you.

April: "Yet He did not waver through unbelief regarding the promises of God, but was
strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had
the power to do what He had promised."-Romans 4
Msg: Believe in the promises that I had promised you because I am God. Be
Be Faithful in what i have called you to do. Don't give up.

May: "My heart is steadfast, O LORD, my heart is FIXED!"-Psalms
Msg: You see what I will do."You better start praying for him seriously. Relationship is
is not the priority.

June: "And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.."
Msg: You have to surrender him to Me and be faithful in praying. He has to go through
it alone. You cannot be with him. You stand aside and pray for him. I am going to
transform him for the next 6 months. I am going to give you a re-new relationship.

July: "There are many plans in a man's heart, nevertheless the LORD's counsel that will stand."
Msg: You can plan but I determine the steps. I am the Lord.

August: "But w/0 faith it is impossible to please Him for he who comes to God must believe that
He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who dilligently seek Him."-Hebrews 11:19
Msg: You seen my works. Why did not believe? I am your rewarder.

September: Remember who God is. Have faith. No doubts. "What does the Lord require of You?
To act justly and love mercy and to walk humbly with God."-Micah 6:8
Msg: I desire obedience and not sacrifice.

October: Sacrifice him on the altar like Abraham to Issac. I am Your First Love. What if I say
"NO?"
Msg: What is God's will for me? It is to love Him with all my heart, mind, soul and
strength. It is by God's grace that everything happened. I don't deserve it at all.

November: "not to recieve the grace of God in vain. For He says: In an acceptable time i have
heard you. And in the day of salvation i have helped you. Behold, now is the
acceptable time, now is the day of salvation."-2 Cor 6:1-2
Msg: I have answered your prayers. My grace has poured forth in both of you.
Do not forget that. My grace is still in working.

December: "I have faith in God that it will happen just as He told me."-Acts 27:25
Msg: My promise still stands. (God hasn't finished speaking to me..=))

What a journey isn't it?

Sorry God that I have been a nag and faithless daughter. =) Well. I cannot do good w/0 You. I cannot live w/0 You. I feel so tempted to write some other things down but NAH. I am still rational ya?

You are one who wouldn't hurt me. Thank you

2008-11-26T21:41:00.000-08:00

Thank God for Answered Prayer

I found a place to stay! I got to write this down because i must always proclaim God's goodness. I started praying in August committing to God about my residence. I remember exploring with a friend in september and she is willing to pray about it. I was excited with ONE OPTION!! I told God that location she is staying is great because of certain reasons. Heez. God knows cause. I was talking to Him about it like a little girl to her Daddy.

I also pray to God in August for a place that cost a certain amount, quite low, with a Christian family and yes, preferably in a specific location. When my friend's place is not available, I am really quite upset. THen, i braced up and decided to explore other places. My Auntie's place came to my mind. OPTION 2. She stays in Bukit Panjang. I spoke to my mum and we quarrelled. Well, I went home to confess my sin and anger. I was really alright the next morning with God's grace.Then I explored another place, but felt still not very ready. It was already mid-november. I remembered that I told TTC people that i would move out by december...(I mean end of december) So, thinking to myself that i have time to think and pray somemore. I am not giving up okie.

One time,I saw Classified (The Straits Times) on my table then i browse through realising that the amount i prayed for was way below market-price. Many friends i shared with think I am ridiculous. Well, I noted down some potential numbers to call from Classified but I was so uncomfortable with the thought that I didn't call at all. I was quite stubborn. I think my mum, my friends think I am plain stupid or stubborn. It doesn't bother me that i have no place to stay, no options...IF I PRAY AND ASK MY DADDY GOD IN HEAVEN, HE WILL PROVIDE.

MOCCA.com and Classified is NOT an option.

On Sunday 16th November..a lady came with her daughters. She is Pastor's friend. And she visited the church for 3 times. She is not looking to rent out her place but she is willing to explore me staying with her! And when i asked her where she stays, she said..."Choa Chu Kang"...Because I specifically ask for it..."Praise God! Confirm this is the place God has blessed me already because I asked!" She was really open for me to stay..Of course, i didn't said that lah. I went back to pray fervently for a few days..and visited her place on 18th November..It's was good! Thank GOD!!! He is really POWERFUL!

TTC Season-Let the pictures tell the stories.

One of the very first things i did when i moved in! I paint! I love to paint =D I must remind myself everytime i come home. "There is no reason not to smile! God is with me!" And my fav verse: Mark 12:20 "To love God with all your heart, all your mind, all your soul and strength."

I walk through this pathway everyday! Sometimes, I hop from tile to tile, singing songs. Sometimes, I drag my feet back after a bad day.

A beautiful canopy of "Stars" My favorite view in my room because it's so romantic. I always pray with this view..=D Okie. I must think a this pic because it's 3 in 1 collegeOkie. I stay @ the building behind me. =) It's a cosy haven! Thank God for His provision!

2008-11-25T02:50:00.001-08:00

Thank God for a good neighbor

Well, I am glad that he found me on Face-book! It's my friendly neighbor, Andreas Pilipus! It's worth mentioning on my blog because I am going to move out soon and he is a great neighbor =D

I remembered I moved into my current place March this year in two days time. It was an answered prayer. Thank God for His BIG grace. Then, i travelled to Thailand the day after. I came back on a weekend with a load of clothes to wash. But i was a newbie. So....

I went up to the Guys Level and tip-toed into it. I don't know ladies are not allowed at Guys-level. Then, i saw him playing guitar in his room. He was so kind to immediately put away his things and attend to me. He brought me to the washing area and gave me some tokens. I was comforted to have a friend at a strange place. =) Thank you Andreas for being a nice neighbor!!
Thank God for you @ TTC!!

Haha. Once his shirt dropped off from his level. (He is staying at level 3) while myself (level 1) and I happened to pick it up, washed it and returned it back. Haha...i don't know why he likes to hang his clothes at the railings. His clothes is always slipping off the railings! Haha..he blesses me with the very good apple pretzel @ railway mail after I washes his clothes. =D Rewarded for a good deed..=)

Well, TTC was great season. =) With the wind, the good cosy air, the nature, the mosquitoes, the frogs and earthworms and with good neighbour like Andreas! Thank God!

Will miss the TTC time!

2008-11-23T23:31:00.000-08:00

Beloved Makan Session
As usual. I am amusing them with my games. =D Ehm. But, they look amused?!

From Left to Right: Huili, Ruth, Yan Ping, Elaine, Ling Li, Jacqueline, Guna, Klement, Matthias, Me and Lawrence

Okie. I must confess that I didn't really plan for this session. It's my dear Janjan who did everything..co-ordinating it all. Haha..if you are reading this, thank you Janjan! It's a pity that you can't make it in the end!

Well, my call for Beloved is really to build the team so, i decided to have a makan session over the usual Bible study every month. (anyway, i am running out of bible studies topics..have been giving so many studies that i very stuck alreadi...help Lord!) People naturally bond over food and games-that's Singaporean..haha

Well, we had lots of food and games..and we had left-overs too. Bless to the security. I hope you guys enjoyed your time @ the session! More will come next year!

Meanwhile.....i want to say that i miss

Junwen, Hanwen, Janjan, Esther and David

who did not manage to join us. Hope you catch up with you guys soon! =D

Stay tune for my Christmas party which is on 20th Dec!

2008-11-20T02:30:00.000-08:00

+ The World +

"The world is build for the majority and not the minority. Let's make this world a home for the minority as well." -Lance Ng (GAT)

Alright. I have many thanksgiving to God who is always so GOOD, MERCIFUL, LOVELY, GREAT and MAGNIFICIENT.

But, I am truly inspired by the people i met @ the Social Enterprise Forum organised by the NUS Business School. In the past, you wouldn't find me interested in Business, stepping in Business schools etc. To me, we are living in a world of CAPITALISM that sells us the idea and belief system that in order to make money and survive, we need to make lots of profits on the expense of others. And, sadly this whole belief system has turned into the world system today. Selfish Capitalism. Who says we couldn't survive otherwise else? I refuse to be fed by such ideology and chose a life that i would find meaning and purpose in. A life that I have chosen that living is giving. I invest my resources and myself to relationships, people. Even if you die, your life continues in others because of your investment.It's lecacy they call.

I listened to Lance Ng from GAT (Gift and Take), Tong Yee (School of Thought), Mr Wilson Ang (ECO.Singapore) and Ms Kala Karkal (Dignity Links Ltd) At once, i met very inspiring like-minded people and I applauded their efforts. I have no comments, no questions but to thank God for these people.

Lance Ng asked the audience a question: "What is your purpose in life?"

He continued:

"The more you think about yourself, the more pain you see and feel. The depressed you become. But, when you start living for others and not yourself, when you stop taking and taking and start giving, the pain disappears and joy sets in." (Not exact words)

Indeed. Self-centeredness is a sin, that's why God called us to look beyond our flesh. Nowadays, many of us cared too much about ourselves. How we feel. What we want. It's a ME society. Haiz. How true the Holy Bible says about human nature.

Well, i believe that Redeemption of the person/soul is not THE END. How can it just be it? God is bigger than that. God not just want a restored relationship with His people but He wants to redeem the whole world to Himself. A world filled with lies.

Now the LIES of the world is telling us:

* Human life is a batch of cells. [Evolution Theory]
* Because of that, abortion before a certain number of weeks is not a life but just cells!
* Because of that, human beings is not worthy. You just live and drift..then you die.
* Because of that, pre-martial sex is ok. It's my life. Multiple-partners is ok. Divorce is ok.
* Because of that, humans think about themselves all the time. Selfishness. It's "I" all the time
* Romantic love is just measured by generally feelings.
* It's a dog eat dog world. The fittest survive.

But God is telling us: (It's the truth):

*Human being are not just a batch of cells but there is soul, spirit and flesh. We are made in God's image and is important to Him
* We are so important that He sent His only Son, Jesus to die for our wrong-doings
*We are loved, cared for and should be treated with dignity
* Because of that, abortion is NO because human life is worthy. God created everyone of us
* Because God cares for us, we are created for a purpose. We should live meaningfully
* Because of that, we should not go around hurting others, getting in and out of a relationship.
* Feelings is not love. If you experience feelings, it is called "Attraction". But, love cannot be measured by feelings.
* It's not suppose to be a dog eat dog world.

WHY ARE WE BUYING INTO ALL THESE LIES?
if you read God's Word for us, you will find a very different world God wants us to stay in. The world is going to change for the worst. This is NOT IT. But, nevertheless, please come and know the truth now before you are sucked into the world system.

Jesus, COME!! we are desperate for you.

2008-11-12T21:32:00.000-08:00

My God is gracious to me, I don't deserve it.

When I call out to Him, He answers my prayers.
When I cried and feel lonely, He says "Here I am, Dawn."
When I needed guidance and help, He assured me that He will guide me
When I sinned and turn back from Him, He paitiently turn me back to Him
When I asked for forgiveness, He forgave me in Christ's Name

"Hear, O LORD, when I cry with my voice!
Have mercy also upon me, and answer me.
When You said, "Seek my face."
My heart said to You, "Your face, LORD, I will seek."

When my father and my mother forsake me,
Then the LORD will take care of me" -Psalm 27

Actually, I really don't deserve His grace. Even knowing God and His goodness, my heart still harden with pride, with sin. Who am I that I deserve His goodness, His grace, His unconditional love and His faithfulness? Only for the past year, struggling alone then I know:

NOW:

+ Nobody will be as faithful as God. Nobody will stand by you at ALL times.
+ Nobody will take care of me when I am sick except for God
+ Nobody will provide for needs except for God
+ Nobody loves me like God did
+ Nobody will discipline me like God
+ Nobody will believe in me like God did
+ Nobody will guide me till death like God
+ Nobody will know you like God did
+ Nobody will care for you like God did.

Even if your parents forsake you, people leave you..God is always with You.

I look forward always, everyday to communion with my God. I like spending time, burying in praying and writing every night. =D My place is really quiet and I am enjoying it till there is no more. There are uncertainties in my life always but My God is my resilience, my strength. When trials come, struggles, difficulties..whether you are IN NEED or IN LACK, I want to delight in Him.

Always in His Wings,
Dawn

2008-10-27T18:46:00.000-07:00

Mr Yet

A dear friend and mentor to me. Someone that has made me cry many times..haha..=) Really admired his passion and love for the youths and music. He has been telling us about his album. Finally, it's out!

SUPPORT HIM!!!!

I was touched by his dream-finally a dream realised. When I listened to his songs, I felt the hardwork and passion in all. I was so touched that i teared. =) esp some of the songs and also videos.

About Yet:

Arts has always been part of YET's life. At the age of 12, YET has already started to pen original songs with his limited vocabulary and some knowledge of music theory. Yet was also a column cartoonist of Lian He Zao Bao Fu Kan for a period of time. He had also been writing and contributing articles to Chinese newspapers. Besides, he used to be regular participant in several Singing Competition and Songwriting competition. He used to be lead vocalist in a band and was a baritone with Metro Philharmonic Youth Choir. YET has also performed at several Charity events, D&D, weddings and corporate functions and school events. For a period of 6 years, he has been one of the key performers at MusicDreamer Cafe. YET plays the guitar, piano and drums and is also well verse in lyrics and melody writing. A graduate with Bachelor Degree in Arts and Social Sciences, majoring in Social Work and Chinese Language in NUS, YET is currently a social worker handling children and youths issue.

As much as he is passionate of his work as a social worker, Yet is as passionate and crazy about his music. Through music, he has been taught a lot about life. He believes deeply that perseverance and conscientious effort is the key to resolving any obstacle. Life goes on as there is always hope.
Today he has decided to do something for himself after 10 years of hard work in the music journey. His debut album will be launched on 20 Sep 2008. YET would like to dedicate the album to you and wish that you find hope in his album.

Check out:

http://www.iamyet.net/index.htm

2008-10-23T04:16:00.000-07:00

Calling

I have a calling. When I was 14 years old. I saw television of children lying on the streets unloved, uncared for and unwanted. I cried. I tell myself: "I want to live a life giving to the needy children and youths." That's when my social worker dream was born. That time, i wasn't a Christian but i clearly knew that i would settle for nothing less than being in the helping profession because to me, that's was the only meaningful life i knew.

Children Society Internship

I never lost that passion and when i became a Christian, it grew stronger. At 18, i was doing my Dipolma in Interactive Media Design @ Temasek Polytechnic, majoring in Film. I like directing and acting. For my internship, instead of going to Mediacorp for internship, i went to Children Society. I wanted to go into social work but i knew the only way then was through NUS social work and with my grades, I can't. Anyway, I wouldn't and couldn't give up.

Christian Studentcare

When i graduated, I ended up in a Christian Studentcare. That's was my first experience working with children. To be honest, i was really bad. I felt so inadequent that time. Children aren't all angels. I prayed very hard every lunch time and was really asking myself if I really want to be in Socialwork working with children and youths. I have no experience and no skills. I am really bad at what i was doing. I struggled like crazy. And, I took my part-time degree course in Psychology knowing that that is another way to gg to social work. I wouldn't and couldn't give up.

Christian Kindergarten

I went to a Christian Kindergarten after that. I just wanted to gain experience working with children. I LOVE YOUNG CHILDREN. Don't tell their parents! I would snap some of their pictures in my phone and look at them before i sleep sometimes. THEY ARE SO BEAUTIFUL. And, I love talking to them. =D Every single unhappy moment would be gone just talking to them. I know how parents could feel so tired after work but when they come back seeing their toddlers running to them, AWWW....EVERYTHING IS WORTH IT. It was a great period of my time. I remembered many of their beautiful faces now. I can still remember them sitting at my lap and i always hug them!!! =D Well, i had struggles too. My pay was very little that time and I was studying part time, struggling to pay my school fees. God always provides and it's was all worth it. =)

Gangsters and rebellion @ Social Service agency

Thank God for the job even though i have no experience and no qualification, they gave me a chance due to my passion. I ended up with 20 boys with tattoos and all from gangs. ~Haha. What a start. I almost drowned but I learnt the hard ways. I see them everyday and actually, i grown to love them because they are simply people who many seen as rude, delinquent, no future etc. But, they are simply not describe above!! They are really people with stories to tell and potential. Then, i worked with children too. The children i worked with outsmart me all the time. They run, they hide and they messed things up. Nothing new under the Sun. They are not angels! But, really children who are trapped. Really trapped. I shall not describe further. I constantly must learn how to handle every single child and youth. All different. I really admire the resilient in tough circumstances. They are all so young..and sometimes, it really angry and sad to see all these happening. =( Well, that's why social workers are here for. NOT that we want to save the world. But, WE BELIEVE IN EACH AND EVERYONE OF THEM THAT THEY ARE WORTH THE LOVE, THE WORK, THE EFFORT AND THE TIME. Do you agree with me? That's why I wouldn't and couldn't give up.

Now: Children's work.

I never doubt God's calling for me in the serving the children and youth. I wasn't natural at it. I wasn't born with the gifting. If you see me now, you would say I am because I can talk to any child of any age and background any youth of age and background. But, it was God's work for me. I struggle now and I feel inadequent. But, I wouldn't and couldn't give up. I have decided that my life is to give to them.

Children and youths.

It's my calling.

My partner [hubby] needs to have the same calling because together, God will use us. =) That's my desire and prayer.

If I am not a social worker.....

~I would be a Full time Mummy and Wife, loving and caring for my hubby and children

~A Church worker [working w children/youths]

~A Childcare teacher [*One of my dreams*]

I am sure all these above would come by in seasons of my life. =)

Prayer:

Dear Father in Heaven, You know my struggles and inadequency. But because of my weaknesses, You are strong in Me. Your grace never fails me. Your grace is a BIG BIG grace. I am Your child. Hug and embrace me every day because I need You. I feel so small for the big task you have laid me for me now. Even though you have place it in my heart for one year, Lord, I still feel overwhelmed. But, Your timing is a perfect one. Those moments when you place in my heart and I became impaitient, You said "Dawn, you have to be faithful. Wait upon Me." And, when it finally comes, I still feel off-guard. How strange, how weird and how funny I can be. But, Lord, You love me.

There is another thing that you have placed in my heart for almost 1 year now. Lord, as usual, i am impaitient. Your voice is really clear in this matter yet, i can doubt You. I have sinned and I need Your forgiveness. I cannot ask You "how long must I wait?" or neither am I in the position to do anything. I can only surrender to You daily and say "Lord, You work in Your ways." Because, it obviously the best. Thank You Lord for everything

"My Soul Followeth Hard After Thee: Thy Right Hand up Holdeth Me."-Psalm 63. God, I will never want to lose sight of You. I will follow You wherever You lead me. I cannot do without You. Even if my parents forsake me, even if nobody cares for me, even if I am all alone, Lord, you will take care of me. Thank You Lord for everything

In Jesus Christ' Name I committ and pray,
Amen

My Jesus-Lover of my Soul.

2008-10-13T18:54:00.000-07:00

**Night with Matthias-every moment of education

I looked really young right? I was just a mere 19 years old.

When I went over last night, my brother was SULKING. Orh. I haven't seen him sulk so badly for a long time. I realised that he wasn't watching his BEN-10 cartoon which is till 7.55pm every weekday night. Gosh. "he must be feeling really down not watching BEN-10."

My aunt and Matthias are like rivals because they both want to watch television. And, the television in the living room is the only one which has cable. Yesterday my aunt beat Matthias to the tube first and he was really angry. =( My mother wasn't around for a few nights as she went overseas to take care of my eldest sister. So, i have been 'parenting' him over his homework for a couple of nights.

"Dawn, you better scold Matthias! He doesn't listen to us! He shouts at lynn (our domestic helper) and me when he is angry! He is soon having exams and cannot watch television!! He doesn't know how the children in poor countries feel. He should feel really lucky to be in Singapore!" my aunt complained. [think we cannot expect children to feel so deeply of something/someone they have not known.It's unfair to them and non-educating]I kept quiet, listening to her opinions and went to clarify with lynn about the matter.

When we were having tuition, i delibrately ignored his sulks. Normally, i would like to settle the matter first but i thought he needs to learn to control his emotions. I told him

"No matter how you are feeling now, you need to learn to put them aside and focus on doing your best in your work."

I thought i made a wise move. He managed to put those sulks aside and focus. Well, anger diminished over 1 hour. He was alright after awhile but this matter must be resolved. I took our bible story time to process through the matter.

Dawn: What happen?

Matthias: What do you mean what happen?

Dawn: Is what Aunt said true?

Matthias: I only shout to them sometimes and not really so loud.

Dawn: Well, can you tell me abit more of what happened?

So, we talked. And, he felt really sorry for shouting. Every moment is an educating moment. Every child can be taught and no one should expect them to simply know it all to behave rightly. We need to guide and teach them. We need to listen to them before forming an opinion. That helps. Even if they are wrong, they felt understood.

Matthias: I already said sorry to God in my heart.

Dawn: hm. I think you should sorry to God again, and also aunt and Lynn too.

Matthias: *Shy* must i really do it?

Dawn: When you do something wrong, you must say sorry. Even if the person did it first. And, you can't always expect others to say sorry to you. But, you can learn to be forgiving and gracious.

Matthias: Alright. [he shared his opinion before saying alrights. Maybe it's really really hard. I am learning too]

Our prayers requests/items that night:

* Mummy to know God and love God. To be safe in overseas
* Aunt to know God and love God. Protection over her
* Matthias to say sorry to God
* Matthias to promise not to be proud
* Gor Gor to be made very clever and so that he can finish his assignment by thursday.
* Matthias to get all Band 1s for all subjects.
* Many people to know and love God

I taught him the Lord's prayer last week. Prayers must be HONEST AND SIMPLE to God.

2008-10-10T02:04:00.000-07:00

Happy 13th Birthday, Fiona dear!

I am not Lesbian. But I am a Youth-worker. =D And we love our youths ya? Right..youthworkers out there?! [okie. I confess i am just alittle crazy. Haha. =)

Fiona is PRETTY, SMART, SENSIBLE, ADORABLE, LOVING AND SOOO HARDWORKING!

Love ya!

Right. I was alittle late for Fiona's celebrations. I am caught in the meeting with my boss. Sorry gals that I made you ladies wait at BPP. Guess I made it up with Macs? I am so glad to see you girls after a while. Some of you have grown much like our dear Sheh-teng~both in 'mind', 'body' and 'emotions' ya? Haha. Our 'Shi-fu'..Some of you went to schools so far..Jurong west! After so many months of absent, ta-ta!! We are gathered!

To our dear Fiona meimei, Happie 13th Birthdaes. We are blessed to have you as a friend and sister and hope you enjoyed your celebrations. Ehm. We know that you are still in your mids of exams. You are supposed to be born in november...=) haha.

We are a giggling batch. We react to camera and pose like crazy. How do we look with tissues? You may think it's lame..!! But, who cares?!

Yeh. I know you ladies wants the photos. Here they are!!! =D Welcome to load it from my blog.

2008-10-05T18:44:00.000-07:00

The Beloved Annual Retreat 2008~01 October 2008

The Beloved Group 2008

To the left [bottom]: Elaine, Janice, Dawn [me], Ken, Lawrence,

[Top]: Ruth, Jacqueline, Uncle Chris, Jun wen, David, Guna

Bible Study led by Uncle Chris: Top 6 Traits of a Born again Christian

While they are praying...I am..[ehm] playing..

I don't fancy bowling..but i can pose well with the ball..[hee.]

Spot my bro, Matthias..[the cutest among the three...opps]

Our annual Beloved Retreat 2008 =D.

Last year was @ East Coast, Chalet on 13th October. I stayed overnight there after e retreat. And the sweet moments...=) Ya...it was history.

This year was a whole day from 11am to 10 pm at where I stay, Trinity Theological College. We had worship and prayer, bowling, group activities, bible studies and BBQ..and wine...eeks..=)

I was glad most of us could make it. =D Thank God because it's the most important event of the year where we get into perspective of God's direction for us for the year 2009. I am really dead serious about His direction for us. This year, I took a few months of seeking Him for His direction plus some meetings with my leaders to present it to the rest of my members. Thank God that when we seek Him dilligently, we will find Him.

We have 4 new members this year. Ruth, Elaine, Jacqueline and Esther..=) Welcome! Let me introduce them alittle. Ruth is Lawrence's girlfriend to be..[heez] and she is from Malaysia, Elaine and Jacqueline are my dear friends who became Christians this year and Esther is social worker to be & a friend from another Bible Study Group, WORD group.

We are 4 years old! Beloved Group has two ministries. One is a outreach events ministry and another is a community outreach ministry. Aside from that, we support Christians members in our team the best that we can with fellowship, bible studies and lots of love, prayer and support. Haha...Beloved is a people ministry.. Visit:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/thebeloved/

Truly. The burden for Beloved has not cease even though i am kinda tired. I thought of stepping down but God said "no"..so, I renewed my committment till 2010 before God this year to the Beloved Group. I love each and everyone of them and hope to nurture and encourage them to love God. Whoever that comes into the group, i will get to know and love you too. Loving them is a committment regardless of what happen or who they are so it's not easy. Anyway, I must march on. I pray really for God's strength, anointing, faithfulness, love to help me perserve through the next 1 and half years. Do pray for us. =)

I am a weird one. Most leaders you seen around are dynamic, charismatic, deep, theologically chim, thinking ones. I am.....................[guess you can see in the pic]

~I lost weight ya? Dunno why. Maybe I am sick..=( I will try to take care

One simple and silly girl who needs God alot alot.. Thank God for His Holy Spirit's empowerment or I don't think I can make it.